My story like this is more about my blindness in one eye, but it's similar.
When i was about your age I met a guy and we hit it off really well, or so I thought. But after every time we got together, i would be able to almost physically feel him back away the next day. Hell, on the ride home--because of my vision issues, I don't drive at night and he would have to pick me up and drop me off at home. I also carry a pocket flashlight with me at night.
Anyway, after one rendezvous, he complained that while we were together he was actually able to forget about my vision problems, but that seeing me take the flashlight out "brought it all rushing back". He didn't last a whole lot longer, because I finally figured out all he was after was FWB but couldn't admit it.
Next guy I dated, on our second in person date (we met online and had talked via computer and phone for several months), I told him the above story and said "I need to know if this is going to be that kind of issue for you, and I'd rather know now than later". He smiled at me, said, "I know this much. NO one. In my position. Should EVER. Forget about this" and pointed at my blind eye by gently touching that cheek.
That was I think sometime in 2008. We've been married for six years and I STILL get a little teary telling that story.
THAT'S the kind of guy you need. No, DESERVE. I know it's hard right now, but good riddance to bad rubbish. With everything else you have to deal with, you need that kind of life-partner like a hole in the head.