No need to be embarrassed about asking questions. Our ability to continue to learn is our single best tool to manage BGs and deal with the complexity of T1 diabetes.
Here are the things that I do to combat post-meal spikes:
1.) I use food labels and/or a digital scale to calculate the actual carb content of my meal. An educated guess is OK for once in a while dining out but swagging at home buys you a ticket to ride the glucocoaster.
2.) I follow a lower carb diet, about 50 - 100 grams per day. I didn't do this until last year, my 28th year as a T1. It has had a dramatic positive effect on my control.
3.) I always bolus at least 15 minutes before I eat at home. I push that to 30 minutes or more if my sugar is higher. I watch my BG on my CGM and confirm with a fingerstick so that I don't end up hypo as I start to eat.
4.) I exercise every day. I walk 40-60 minutes per day. Walking after you eat does wonders for post meal BGs; my walking rate is at a comfortable pace. I can easily hold a conversation at the speed I walk. Use your meter to advise you on post meal exercise timing.
5.) Since I don't consume a lot of carbs, I bolus for fat and protein using a combination (dual-wave) bolus. I take some insulin right away for the carb content and some insulin over time for the fat/protein content.
6.) The best meal dose will not control your after meal BGs if your basal rate is not matched well to your personal needs. I recommend Gary Scheiner's Think Like A Pancreas protocol for setting up a good basal rate.
7.) Test. Test. Test. And write stuff down. Keeping a written log, at least while you're making changes will keep you from chasing your tail! With all the factors that affect BGs, it can get very confusing in a hurry.
Good luck to you. You are asking the right questions.