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Permalink Reply by Daena on August 16, 2007 at 9:27am

I think about that a lot. Some here know my situation - diagnosed with DKA and a good number of symptoms typical of Type 1 diabetes, but because of several factors (to cut a long story short), my endo is not sure if I have T1 or T2 and so I'm waiting to get my c-peptide test results and hopefully some answers to this mystery.

I confess I'm probably at the highest possible risk for T2. Overweight (NOT obese. I calculated my BMI), Asian, family history of T2 (grandma and cousin on the maternal side), formerly sedentary lifestyle (trying not to slide back into it now that school has opened and I get tired easily with the workload). And so I did promise myself to be calm when my endo formally diagnoses me as either T1 or T2.

However, I have secretly hoped that she will tell me its T1 so I don't have to blame my unhealthy lifestyle habits (which ARE changing for the better) and can just put the blame on my own immune system. Even when I was first diagnosed, the first thing I did when I was conscious enough to know I'm diabetic, I blamed myself for it.

I'm extremely scared of people pointing fingers at me and telling me it's my own doing. I don't deserve diabetes. Neither do you, but sometimes it just happens due to genetics or lifestyle or whatsoever. I think that's something I am really afraid of.

So yes, I think there is some element of guilt for me even though I call myself an unknown diabetic. I always wonder if there would've been a different outcome should I have taken better care of my health. But diabetes is now always going to be a part of my life and so I have to suck it up and live.

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Permalink Reply by MeadowLark on August 16, 2007 at 9:32am

Sometimes both. Mainly just stress. and then sometimes my own "pertinacity"! LOL!
My husbands one word for my diabetes is that I am "Pertinacious." ( More stubborn than most:D
I'm eating right today... exercise? running after the kids and doing the normal stuff for a mom with 6 kids at home. LOL! My bloodsugar numbres today?
They STINK! I have no idea why.
Guilty? why? I havent done anything wrong for it today.
When I do cheat and eat... Guilty? Nope! Just "pertinacious!"
My fault? hmmmm I think genetics plays large part in our lives. (at least 50/50) So. I'll take a "very small dose of "my fault." I think when I finally learned about nutrition was when I had to start "owning up to my part."
I love the way you all help me to think this "dis - ease" mess all the way through:) At least my mind should be healthy:)
MeadowLark

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Permalink Reply by Sherrie E on August 16, 2007 at 9:52am

I always wonder if a person doesn't get obese because they have Type 2 diabetes, rather than obesity causing Type 2. But, I feel that non-Type 2 people treat us like they might treat people, who have had lung cancer because they smoked cigarettes their entire lives. "You ate. You got fat. You got Type 2." I don't think that's a very fair generalization or assumption. Isn't it enough to feel guilty about being over-weight without having others add more guilt by blaming you for your own Type 2 diabetes?

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Permalink Reply by Daena on August 16, 2007 at 10:04am

yeah, i sometimes feel like that too. good thing for me, my friends and family are wonderful, loving and supportive. they know it is not my fault that i'm diabetic, at the age of 20, no less! i know i have people to run to to whine about all this horrible stuff. so they may not understand completely but at least i know i have many shoulders to wet.

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Permalink Reply by Chloe on August 16, 2007 at 10:35am

I just wanted to say that NO ONE should feel at all guilty about their diabetes. It is not anyone's fault!!! It's hard enough to manage on a day to day basis, without adding guilt and blame to the mix. Let yourself off the hook, and take control. That should make you feel better physically & emotionally.

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Permalink Reply by jujubean on March 10, 2010 at 1:57pm

i agree, no one deserves diabetes of any type! i'm a type 1 but i have friends and family members and the majority are not heavy, in fact one cousin is 5'7" and weighs 144 with type 2. my endo says it's not all about obesity. i have a cousin living in germany (the yummiest food!) she is 5'11" and weighs around 400. she has always been a big girl even when we were kids, she is still quite heavy and her blood sugar highs are around 110. so go figure. i was worried about her because she was having knee surgery and the doctor checked her for diabetes and her A1c was 5-6 and blood sugar was 93 after she had eaten. it amazed me. i checked her periodically when she visited last may and she was anywhere from 80-110. and this is a big girl, size 4x-5x tops and 26-28 pants. so NO, it is not just heavy people. once again, heavy or not, no one deserves diabetes. everyone take good care :) juliet.

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Permalink Reply by mollyjade on August 16, 2007 at 11:17am

I always point out to people that there are other risk factors for type 2 besides weight. There's age, ethnicity, body shape, and having family members with diabetes. And none of those are anything a person can control.

I think guilt is something that's hard to control. My mother is convinced she gave me type 1 by feeding me cow's milk at too early an age. No matter how often I show her studies that show that that's not likely, she can't stop blaming herself.

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Permalink Reply by The Diabetic Welfare Queen on February 24, 2010 at 7:09pm

Way to go, mollyjade! Well said!

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Permalink Reply by Halle on August 16, 2007 at 12:38pm

Intellectually I don't think being fat=you are at fault for your diabetes, but emotionally I guess I do. Because I haven't really told anyone except my husband yet. I don't want to have to tell anyone, I'm already asthmatic and allergic....it's just one more reason to label me, and I don't want another label. I don't know how long I can go on not telling anyone, that's stupid. I just don't want to face anyone's opinions of me.

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Permalink Reply by Sherrie E on August 16, 2007 at 1:03pm

I'm with you, Halle, on not wanting one more "sickie" label. I already walk with a brace because of drop foot from a genetic back problem. I, too, have asthma. Have hypothyroidism. Also, have dealt with poly-cystic ovary disease since I was a teen. Come to find out, research is showing that many women with PCO disease end up with Type 2 diabetes.

Many healthy people just don't seem to get it. They think too many trips to DQ=Type 2.

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Permalink Reply by Jenny on August 16, 2007 at 3:50pm

Well, I don't have type 2 diabetes, but I only learned that 7 years after I was diagnosed with Type 2. Since I had been normal weight all my life until AFTER my blood sugar went blooey, I never bought into the blame thing. But it did impell me to do some research to see what the truth was.

Whhat I learned pretty much backed up my suspicions: You need to have an underlying medical condition to get diabetes. It ISN'T caused by obesity. Most people who are obese NEVER develop diabetes. And there's some evidence that it is the underlying disorder that CAUSES the obesity found in those diagnosed not the other way around.

Details, here: http://www.phlaunt.com/diabetes/14046739.php YOU DID NOT EAT YOUR WAY TO DIABETES

It really annoys me the way that the media parrot the idea that diabetes is caused by gluttony and sloth. It hurts a lot of people, and more than that, it keeps people from getting diagnosed early, because people are so afraid that a diagnosis will label them as morally inferior.

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Permalink Reply by Sherrie E on August 16, 2007 at 4:10pm

Jenny,
Thanks for that link! I get frustrated when people tell me that Type 1s have diabetes naturally and Type 2s brought it on themselves. grrrrrr.

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