At breakfast, and dinner and snack, I have a different ICR for each. I am a very complicated person. I eat about 140 carbs/day, but my ICR for breakfast is 9. Lunch is 30 and dinner is 12 and snack is 20. In a perfect world, things should work with the math factors, but if I exercise or eat more then I also need to do more U-500. It is a confusing but logical answer. You should know that there is not a diabetic alive that is the same or reacts the same.
You are exactly right. Even when we think we finally understand ourselves, we turn right around and smack ourselves in the face.
Most of the U-500 regimes I have seen suggest a three times a day strategy and not even bothering attempting to bolus. Should you wish to try to peak your insulin for meals, you may need to bolus 3-4 hours before your meal. Have you been prebolusing?
I don't think you're weird, just unique. While I don't have the same problems you do with insulin, you are so right in that no two diabetic persons are ever alike.