Can you truly be happy with Type 1? PLEASE RESOND......

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Permalink Reply by Zoe on June 5, 2009 at 9:07am

Marty, sometimes hiding our feelings about something makes it worse, where letting it out can be a relief. It sounds like you have lots of feelings you are trying to push down such as sadness, fear and anger. People around you can only respond to what they see, so if you are saying "it's cool" they probably feel they need to accept that even if they know you well enough not to quite believe it. I understand yoúr not wanting to "burden them" but I am guessing the people who love you would be glad to support you through this emotionally. If you really don't feel comfortable talking with them about your feelings, though, there are other options. This forum was a great place to start because we all understand what you are going through. But you need to share your feelings with "live people" as well. Some possibilities are a therapist or a diabetic support group. Ask your doctor to refer you. There you will be able to share your feelings without worrying about burdening people. And if you attend a group you will realize that you are not alone and that other people feel some of the same things you do.

Why am I suggesting you need to talk about your feelings? Because "stuffing" your feelings makes it worse. It causes more stress and can even make you physically sick! All the effort that goes into pushing feelings down is more stressful than letting them out! Letting them out will feel like a relief. You have every right to be sad, angry or scared or anything else you are feeling. Allow yourself those feelings and share them with someone and the other benefit is you won't feel so alone.

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Permalink Reply by Jade on June 5, 2009 at 9:15am

Marty! i know exactly how you are feeling.
i was diagnosed only 4 months ago.
Trust me, its ok to wonder "why me" and be frustrated with this disease.
I have even cried a few times.
when my family asks "whats wrong?" and i try to explain, they just tell me its just something i have to deal with and it's not a big deal. But they don't know how much it affects us emotionally because they will never have to deal with diabetes themselves.
So like i was saying, its ok to get frustrated sometimes because it can get tough.
The key is to NOT let those emotions get the best of you, and think about how many other great things you have. [i know i used to get annoyed when people would tell me that, but its the truth!]
and Yes, you will be happy! once you get more used to everything and get your "diabetes" routine down, everything will become easier and you wont have to focus on it as much!
Things will get better i promise, there are MANY people who have great, happy lives that live with diabetes!

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Permalink Reply by Marps on June 5, 2009 at 9:31am

I've had T1 for 11 years. I'm 24 now- BUT I can say that I'm truly happy.
Yes T1 sucks- Yes I've been hospitalized about 20 times over the years including Intensive Care, seizures, insulin shock comas, etc. I've been through a lot. I've seen death knocking more than anyone I know. I've cried and screamed and fought the doctors and my friends, but it's a part of allowing the chronic disease to get under your skin.

Once you've dealt with it for a while, you'll start thinking of it as "something you have to do" instead of "this chronic disease that is dragging me down". It'll be okay. It's alright to feel badly- just keep remembering to pick yourself up again.

We all have something that we deal with. Every single person has something that they wish they could change about themeselves. And every single person has a different idea of what "devestating" is. It's all a matter of perspective.

Living with D is a challenge and it's a journey. There'll be days when you'll think it really isn't that bad- or atleast people don't look and know that you're D based off of appearance alone. Then, there'll be days when you just don't want to deal at all and your gf or mom will have to push you to get through those moments. There'll be days when you can't imagine dealing with this day in and day out for the REST OF YOUR LIFE and it'll seem like such a dismal future...

BUT you'll get through it. And if you feel like you can't, this community is really great.

Every person here knows what you're feeling and what you're going through. I've only joined here a few weeks ago and I've already learned so much- from research to things about myself that I didn't discover until I started to write on these forums. It's really good therapy!

So, hang in there. It's tough- I know, but you'll get through it.

Just think- they've been working on a cure for T1 for, what, 20 years now? They HAVE to be getting closer somehow, right?

Chin up, Marty, you'll be fine.

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Permalink Reply by Jessica C on June 5, 2009 at 9:46am

I think sometimes we all need grief counseling regarding this disease. It really is quite a loss. But, the counseling is to help us look at it positively, and be grateful for what we DO have!

Take care, and know that you are not alone!

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Permalink Reply by Jason on June 5, 2009 at 9:54am

Not to be a debbie downer here, but for me personally, the answer is no. I cannot be as happy as I was before diabetes. It isn't that I'm never happy- I am sometimes. But generally speaking I am too preoccupied with managing my diabetes to enjoy the things that bring me happiness on a consistent basis.

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Permalink Reply by rainbowgoddess on June 5, 2009 at 9:55am

This is still new for you, and it's understandable that you have a lot of complex feelings and emotions right now. You might need to talk to a counsellor or therapist of some sort if you're having trouble dealing with the emotions.

No one is happy all the time. And I'm sure no one is happy to have diabetes. But when you've had it for 36 years, like I have, the injections and the blood tests are just second nature. They're part of the day to day routine, like brushing your teeth or taking a shower or getting dressed.

Am I happy? Not really, but it has nothing to do with the diabetes. I'm unhappy because I don't have a job. That has nothing to do with having diabetes.

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Permalink Reply by Stacey on June 5, 2009 at 10:01am

Absolutely you can be happy with the big D!! :)

Honestly, I think it just takes time. You were just diagnosed a few months ago I cant even imagine what you are feeling...I was diagnosed so young that it was harder for my parents than me at the time
BUT I definitely have my bad times - when I absolutely hate this disease and feel likes it taking over my whole life!! LOL When that happens I try to take a step back and regroup.

I totally understand the feeling that you are burdening others...This, I think, is one of the great points for TuDiabetes! We can come here and vent about how frustrating things are without feeling like we are burdening others bc we ALL understand where you are coming from. With that said, keep talking to your family and GF...they need to know how you feel so that they can help you through things. They may not completely understand but I'm sure they will put out some major effort to help you cope. :)

At this point I'm sure it feels like your D is the focus of your every day...soon you will get into a routine and it will become just another part of your life and those moments of sadness and frustration will fade, no they wont go away, but instead of being all you think about they will just be there occasionally.

In no time you will find yourself laughing at the goofy parts of this disease...like the other morning when I thought my hubby was coming in for a kiss but really he was just getting close to peel a used test strip off my neck!! LOL

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Permalink Reply by Marps on June 5, 2009 at 10:06am

hahaha. Or the time that I used to wear my pump and we went to bed- I woke up to my fiance jumping around the room in a sleepful fit because he couldn't figure out where the alarm was coming from.

He had laid on my pump and the alarm went off letting me know that I wasn't getting dosages. haha.

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Permalink Reply by MelissaM on June 5, 2009 at 12:18pm

oh dear. haha sometimes i wonder if i'll run into that problem.

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Permalink Reply by Anna Martin on June 5, 2009 at 10:18am

As others have said, you get used to it. I got it years ago, when I was a little kid, so I just sort of think of myself as being diabetic in the same way I'm female or I have red hair and freckles (stupid freckles). It's not fair, and I really wish I weren't, but there's nothing I can do to make it go away (just like I can't get rid of my freckles).

I don't really remember being diagnosed, and, since I was young at the time, I didn't really understand the implications, so I can't really tell you what works to get over a diagnosis. Maybe it's not something you ever really "get" over. But there are some positives. I think diabetes tends to make you more responsible (which is probably a good thing). Plus you're more likely to try to get a responsible job with good insurance, instead of spending years as a bartender or something (which, while not pleasant, is probably a good thing).

I think a lot of it, though, has to do with the sort of person you are, and that's not something you can really change. If you're someone who's prone to anxiety and worry (like me!), then you tend to go to the hospital a lot and test a lot, and diabetes tends to cause more problems, at least in the short term. However, if you're more laid-back, I think once you get over the initial diagnosis, it's not to bad. [Side note: That's totally my own personal opinion, and I have no evidence to back it up, but it makes sense in my mind.]

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Permalink Reply by Michael on June 5, 2009 at 10:56am

I saw your post, and wanted to make sure I responded to this one. I was diagnosed with type 1.5 about a year ago. I also am in accounting, have a supportive wife.

I'm going to let the cat out of the bag...Diabetes sucks!...But can you truly be happy?...Absolutely.

My dad was diagnosed with an enlarged heart back in the 60's when he was in his twenties. Was told he would not live to see the age of 30. I was born in '72 and he lived until the age of 58. (Still pretty young, I know) He took pretty good care of himself and saw good Doctors throughout his illness. Either by accident or design, he ended up being a local cheerleader to other heart patients in the community where I grew up.

As a boy, I remember him visiting an acquaintance who had had open heart surgery and was recovering. His quote was "Hurts like a son of a bitch doesn't it!" It would always bring a smile to others faces knowing that they were not the only ones going through recovery.

The quote I use when people ask me about my diabetes is: "It pretty much F*!@ing sucks!" (remember, I am a mild mannered accountant...) It pretty much shuts up the people who don't really care or don't want to talk about it, and you can talk to the people who really do care with a little humor. It helps a little.

I like to think that although I was diagnosed with a chronic disease, it could be a lot worse. One of my best friends was diagnosed with brain cancer a few years ago. After six weeks he was pretty much not himself anymore, and a few months later he was dead. After seeing that, giving yourself shots everyday doesn't seem so bad. After all, it beats the alternative...lol

I try to control my diabetes, and not let it control me. Granted, sometimes its baby steps, but I don't feel that I have given up much of anything truly important to me.

I feel that sooner or later, when anyone gets a diagnosis such as this everyone is faced with a choice. To take care of themselves an move on with life, let themselves die, deny that anything is wrong. Seems to me from your post, that you made the right choice, but are feeling a little sorry for yourself. Its ok for a while. But it shouldn't last forever.

I did cry,just a little ;) when I was first told the news I was going to be insulin dependent. Its ok.

Insulin pumps are great. My brother asked me how I liked it, and before I could answer we said "Must not be to great when you got to be hooked up with a tube all the time" He is pretty much right...lol...But giving yourself shots is the most unnatural thing ever.

BTW CPA exam sucks...

Michael

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Permalink Reply by Christine on November 17, 2009 at 5:09pm

I can totally agree with that!:) I am LADA diagnosed with 25 and also work in accounting;) I couldn't have written this posting any better;)
And yes ...I am happy...(although it felt good last week to cry out my frustration)

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