Okay.  For those of you who know me, I'm a pretty private person when it comes to my D.  I've been type 1 for 12 years and I've struggled pretty badly.  I've been through a lot from ketoacidosis to insulin shock comas, etc.  But it's NOT for lack of trying!  I know a LOT about D, but I'm always still learning.

 

I keep pretty quite about all of this at work.  I work in an office and have worked in an office for about 7 years.  I've been within 3 different departments in the past 7 years, and have managed to keep my diabetes under the radar.  I tell my manager only, and specifically ask her to not talk about it to anyone because I'm not an open person when it comes to my D.  Especially with people that I have to see every single day.  And people who I have to spend 8 hours a day with (which amounts to probably more time than I spend with my family) who THINK they know, but have no idea.  I honestly would rather spend my time working while I'm at my JOB, than arguing with people over what's okay for me to wear and/or what's okay for me to drink.  I don't need people who don't understand my situation to pass judgment on me.

 

So, within the past four weeks, while I was going through some diabetic trauma, with swinging blood glucose from 30 to 300 consistently, my boss told everyone in my office that I was out of work for one day (ONE day!) because I am diabetic.

Now, my co-worker, who is type 2 but under good control (her "highs" are 103), has taken it upon herself to school me on what I should and should not be doing.  The chart above is what was happening when I went home early one day.  I just could NOT concentrate.  Last week she said "I feel the way you were feeling the other day when you went home- all light headed."

"Ummm... you have no idea" is what I WANTED to say, but I just said: "Oh, really?"

I don't EVER skip work or go home early.  I probably took TWO sick days all last year.

 

 

This morning, I'm wearing my awesome shoes- like always- I love heels and strappy shoes, etc. 

I have NO problems with my feet and my Endo has seen me in my fantastic shoes many many times.  He only asks that they fit well when I wear them.  And they do.  NO problems with my feet.

But this morning, she took it upon herself to point out: "Aren't your feet cold?  You aren't supposed to be wearing open toed shoes anyway.  What did your doctor say?"

The only thing I could reply was: "My doctor told me I can wear anything I want to.  Mine is a lot different from yours."

And her reply: "Oh really?"

 

So, I know that she's partly concerned, but part of me thinks she's just looking for someone to relate to, or complain about her diabetes to, or someone to school.  Honestly I've been teaching her about carbs and whatnot for almost two years now- she just never knew WHY I knew so much about all that stuff.

And the tone of her voice is more: "I know something the rest of the office doesn't know." rather than in a whisper of: "I know you don't like to talk about this, but I just wanted to ask if it's different for you to wear shoes like that rather than for me to."

 

It just seems really gossipy and I don't like it.  At all.

I'm private about my health.  I don't want a big production about it.

And I'm really p***ed at my boss for letting it out.  I didn't give her permission to.

 

How would you handle this?

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I know how you feel. I'm open about my diabetes but I still like to be in control of when and how that information is given and I'm very mad when people do to me what was done to you.

I find the best approach is to very simply and quietly say, "You know, I shared that with you assuming that it would be kept private" or "I like to be in charge of dispensing any information about my medical history." You usually get an apology, not an enemy. They usually feel horrible.

Maria
p.s. I wear high shoes too.
I LOVE sexy shoes!
It's so funny. People are specifically asking me for more pix of my shoes! haha.

Maria- we should compare. What size are you? haha.
Sounds like a serious violation of your privacy. The only word for that is "terminated." I really hate that for you. She had no right to do such a thing.

I'm sure you can gently set the type 2 straight.

Go get um girl!
OK..I'd be P***ED!!!! But that's just me...I'm not diabetic but 2 of my sons are. The little one couldn't care less who knows...he's 7 and doesn't remember NOT being diabetic. My oldest son is 21 and was dx last summer T1 and although people he works with know, he has made it VERY clear that he doesn't want to talk about it EVER. He won't even give himself shots unless he's alone or with his D brother. I can totally understand your point! Can you go to HR? This was a PERSONAL MATTER that you made clear you didn't want discussed. Although you can't "un-ring" the bell so to speak...you can make it clear that the discussion has ended....and unless you are on a STRETCHER on your way out, there will be no further discussion about your D.
Or you could find a way to sue your boss...but I don't reccomend that!!! LOL
Marps...I talked to my son yesterday (T1 almost a year now, he's 21) and he was at work. They all ordered pizza for lunch and when it arrived, they all looked at him like..."WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF?" Someone even asked him if they were going to need to call an ambulance for him in an hour. WTF? He is a quiet guy so when he had a little melt down and told them to mind their own business and since HE PAID for the pizza he was going to eat as much as he wanted they kind of shut-up. They know he's diabetic but they never see him test or give himself insulin so they just assume they "know" because they know a guy who knows a guy who has a cousin with type 1!!!!
He can't find a different job because they're hard to come by in his area/field...but he said if he could go somewhere and NOT tell anyone he's diabetic he'd be happy...and he works with ALL MEN!!! I can't imagine how your office must be!!! Good luck and if all else fails...just punch T2....she'll get it after that I'm sure!!! (i'm TOTALLY kidding!)
sexist a bit?
JulieJ- Please hug your son for me.
It's hard enough dealing w this s***e in our own minds. We don't need it for others too. I mean, it's one thing for them to be concerned, or maybe they're trying to make "light" of the conversation, but... do they really think that he wants PIZZA more than he wants LIFE? If it were between the two... yeah, I'd be hard pressed to come up with a decision too. haha. Duh!

Are any of them severely overweight? Maybe he can point out something like that?
"Ummm... are you sure YOU should be eating that John? We might need to call an ambulance when you go into cardiac arrest!"

I know, I know, I know. That's really mean and I would only pull that card if it really came down to them crossing the line over and over again. But no one has the right to embarrass someone else- humiliating it feels like. Publicly no less.

Ok. Done.
Hug him. K? :)
Too funny!!! The cardiac arrest thing!! ok not funny but....ok...yeah it is!!! And I LIVE for the times I can hug that boy! He lives in VA and I'm in VT but I do tell him I love him every single day!! I told him about this site I hope he checks it out!
it is highly annoying to receive unsolicited advice and "scolding" from people who are convinced that they are experts. You'd think someone with the condition would be more understanding, like "I know it's really REALLY difficult", or something along those lines. I don't know if there is anything you can do besides tell this person, in front of your manager, in private, that you don't appreciate her condescending lecture and would appreciate not hearing any more of it.
Steve- Thankfully she's backed off since this post. I said my piece of "We're different." and she hasn't said anything about it since. We'll see what happens later.

But I like your advice. I would prolly have to bring her AND my manager into my VP's office to sit them BOTH down. haha.

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