Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Gary on September 5, 2011 at 11:53am

Yeah just getting through high-school was a nightmare for me. Be proud of of your self going through grueling college. I'd have a better chance climbing a mountain with diabetes then making it through college. Being your on your own be very careful with your sugars at night. Over the last year I've had the paramedics save me a half dozen times. If it weren't for my mom to call them I wouldn't be here typing. Trust me this disease blows, its right up there with worst of them. Yeah you can live nearly as long as a non-diabetic if you take care of yourself and are somewhat lucky but your quality of life is diminished so greatly you gotta wonder if its worth it.

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Permalink Reply by Trudy on September 5, 2011 at 12:15pm

Of course it's worth it Gary! One step at a time, and a better quality of life can be achieved.

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Permalink Reply by Melitta on September 5, 2011 at 12:24pm

Lotsofshots, that is some great advice and great perspective.

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Permalink Reply by Annette on September 6, 2011 at 9:49am

Your words bring tears to my eyes....I have been told these things so many times before. No matter how many times they are said I still end up back in the hospital. Finishing my masters and working full time is not a good enough reason for me to be compliant. I dont have a passion for anything at this point in life, I feel as though I have nothing to look forward to anymore. Im non compliant because Im lazy, Im depressed, and somehow their is nothing that is worth it.

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Permalink Reply by Melitta on September 5, 2011 at 12:41pm

Hi Annette: I believe that you have gotten so many replies here because we all in one way or another, in one form or another, have dealt with depression and diabetes. I hope you will consider our words of support and consider some of the suggestions that people have made. We are here for you, and we know what it's like to walk a mile in your shoes (not to say that every person does not have different "life monkeywrenches"). When I was first diagnosed, I was so angry and depressed, and few people understood that, but I was fortunate enough to find a therapist who has Type 1 diabetes herself. That was really helpful.

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Permalink Reply by Annette on September 6, 2011 at 9:54am

I was also seeing a therapist who had type 1 diabetes. But she was not helpful at all!!!......She thought that making suggestions on what worked for her would work for me, and then she got mad with me because I became distant with her. It was a terrible experience.

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Permalink Reply by Rye on September 5, 2011 at 1:11pm

Well I dont believe in being happy only in being positive about your situation. If you look for things to make you happy you will NEVER be happy...trust me I know...I have always had a chronic depression, I am not a happy person by nature I have to try and what I learned is my attitude and way of thinking is the only thing I can change. I dont like it when people say just be happy like its getting milk at the store, its not that simple for some. And having diabetes does not help. I dont think you want to be depressed or die because your in grad school so you care about your future...As for not knowing where your future will lead no one knows that about themselves so no need to dwell on that....I dont know if where you live is bringing you down also, it sounds like you are in a new environment and could be lonely. Try being a lil bit more friendly at school and work. Join a gym, go to a bar/ lounge. Go to church...I dont know what will make you satisfied with your life only you know that but I do think nothing will change unless you make an effort to change your attitude. I know its hard but you can do it...

And I do recommend you seeing someone if you feel its needed but I wouldnt rush to taking pills...Pills do not fix everything, anytime a side effect could be thoughts of suicide its just not worth it in my opinion...

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Permalink Reply by anagantios on September 6, 2011 at 6:45am

Hey Annette I am right there with you. Right down to the living alone with nothing to do but go to work and come home. No friends, no boyfriend, etc.

I've found that when I have a lot of down time to think, like when I'm sitting at work, I am more depressed than when I have stuff to do. I also tend to hyperfocus on my diabetes and get depressed about that.

I'm not a fan of antidepressants or psychologists. They just don't work for me. And trust me I have been through the ringer with all of them. I think I've seen something like 7 or 8 separate mental health professionals, and eventually even the psychologists give up and try to get me to go on antidepressants.

Right now I take Sam-E which is not an antidepressant but a supplement that's not supposed to be habit forming and seems to take the edge off. I also said "screw the world I'm buying a puppy." It's a lot harder being depressed when you've got a floppy little thing running around your ankles. He helps get me out of the house at least and it's a bit easier to meet people with him. I'm also training him to alert to high and low bloodsugars so he can go everywhere with me, work, school, pet-free housing, whatever. If you're into animals it might be something to think about, even just for the mental side of it.

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Permalink Reply by Annette on September 6, 2011 at 9:26am

I do agree with you, and I have thought about getting a puppy......but because of school and work Im not home for majority of the day to take care of the puppy. I would only have time for the dog on the weekends, and I wouldnt feel right leaving the puppy at home all day long. But it was a good suggestion that I have thought about many times.

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Permalink Reply by Terry on September 11, 2011 at 1:05pm

I've often made the mistake of making concrete suggestions to help people when all they wanted was a sympathetic ear! I'm not certain what you actually wanted by posting here, whether it be good listeners or appropriate advice. Please excuse the following if all you really wanted was someone to listen to you.

I want to second anagantios's positive experience with a canine companion. I've been a T1 for 27 years and have spent most of that time living alone. I've never owned a dog until 18 months ago when I received a hypoglycemia alert dog. Aside from the low blood sugar alert situations that my dog is trained to signal, I am amazed at how he brightens my spirit!

When I get up in the morning my mood is usually somber as I try to marshall some energy for the new day. Things usually start to look better after my first cup of coffee. My dog, however, after a few leg stretches, eagerly greets me with tail wagging as if to say, "Isn't life wonderful?" It's infectious. I start interacting by petting him and "talking to him." Like I've said, I've never had a dog before but now I know why people love the companionship one can bring.

In any case, looking after the needs of another living being moves your focus outward. I know that that is part of the answer to your difficult situation.

Please pardon my lapse into platitudes, but I think that happiness arrives when you're busy pursuing life. It's like those "floaters" that sometimes move across our field of vision. When you try to look at them directly, they disappear.

The beauty of having a service dog is that I can take him everywhere with me. He flies with me in the cabin of commercial airlines, goes to grocery stores, restaurants, and any other place that accommodates the public.

Annette, I wish you the best too! Good luck finding your way through this difficulty. Only you can devise the solution. Other people, especially those you respect, can help by reflecting views of yourself that you can't see introspectively.

Don't give up on yourself -- you have much to offer this world!

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Permalink Reply by CarlaM on September 20, 2011 at 10:42am

Hello, I do not have a dog for my diabetes, just to love. He saved my life a few times I found out. I am 36 and had a 99.9% blockage of my upper LAD. I went to the doctor because at night my dog kept waking me up when my heart was slowing. I would get up to use the rest room after he woke me up and my heart would pound. After the third night of multiple wake ups by a nose in my face and a very alert look on his face I went in. They rushed me to ER and I was having an attack. Had a stent placement and as I look back and since I realized that Roo Roo gets all concerned when my blood sugar drops! Must feel my tension when I try to get it up quickly and now can sense it before I do. He also makes me laugh and relax when my stress is high. He is now a member of the family and we wouldn't want it any other way. I hope you continue to have great memories and good health with you companion. Carla

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Permalink Reply by Brian (bsc) on September 6, 2011 at 10:41am

Everyone has given you great advice. And in your heart, you know that your life is one big spiral. You are depressed, you feel hopeless and you don't take care of yourself. This in turn leads you to feel bad, sick and that feeds your depression. You need some faith. You need some hope. There are clearly others here who have told you that if you take the first steps, you can make some positive changes. I would encourage you to "suspend disbelief." Just do it. You have nothing to lose by trying to help yourself. You may be very surprised at the amount of help that you can actually get. My daughter is in college right now, and she has access to a wide range of services including counseling and a fair amount of those services are available at free or subsidized levels to her.

If you don't try, then you won't get better. All I'm saying is just try.

When you are depressed, all you can see is the gloom around you. But tomorrow is a different day. And tomorrow can be the day that you wake up and turn your life around.

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