DIABETIC JOKES
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Ginny Traynor on -
Love the jokes! Keep them coming!
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Permalink Reply by literaryweasel on -
Amen.
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Permalink Reply by Manny Hernandez on -
LOL!!! I am sorry, dude... this was sad, but funny in the context of this topic! :)
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Permalink Reply by Marps on -
"You're hypo. I'm naked and have ice cream all over me... what are you waiting for?"
http://www.diabetesforums.com/forum/lo-fi/t-14974.html
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Permalink Reply by Marps on
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A woman is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a
diet. "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a
day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time
I see you, you'll have lost at least five pounds."
When the woman returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds.
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says. "Did you follow my
instructions?" The woman nods. "I'll tell you, though, I
thought I was going to drop dead that third day."
"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.
"No, from skipping."
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Permalink Reply by tmana on -
Hmm. I'd've thought it would have been "I've got your number" or "Let's strip together".
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Permalink Reply by Marps on
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Vigorous activity is very good for diabetics. If stomping on a chocolate cake makes you feel better, that's fine
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Permalink Reply by Marps on
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*Enjoy the giddy feeling of living dangerously ALL THE TIME: "Bungee jumping? A walking tour in Zaire? PAH! I have DIABETES!"
http://www.chacha.com/question/what-is-a-diabetic-joke
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Permalink Reply by Marps on
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"We are so dependent on computers and technology, you guys, that I think in our lifetimes, we are going to have to go to the ATM for the doctor. You know? You swipe your insurance card, you swipe your debit card, you stick your finger in for pulse readings."
THANK YOU FOR USING THE AUTOMATED DOCTOR. PLEASE ENTER THE SYMPTOMS YOU THINK YOU HAVE."
"Ok. Um, I've got blurred vision, I can't see out of my right eye, and I have fainting spells."
THANK YOU. THE AUTOMATED DOCTOR HAS LOOKED AT YOUR SYMPTOMS AND DETERMINED THAT YOU EITHER HAVE GLAUCOMA OR DIABETES. PLEASE PRESS ONE IF YOU BELIEVE YOU HAVE GLAUCOMA. PLEASE PRESS TWO IF YOU BELIEVE YOU HAVE DIABETES.
[shocked expression]
YOU HAVE CHOSEN DIABETES... YOU DO NOT HAVE THE FUNDS FOR DIABETES. PLEASE PRESS ONE IF YOU NOW BELIEVE YOU HAVE GLAUCOMA.
"This system doesn't work at all. My receipt says that I have skavies and kennel cough. wtf?"
-Kristin Linder http://www.chickcomedy.com/videos/41/ATM-Doctor
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