How did your parents give support?
Hello Everyone. I am the mom of a 3yr T1, dx just over 6 months ago. Overall, we are doing pretty well. My question is for those that were dx as a child. Of course, my daughter comments about how she hates diabetes and that she wants it to go away or wants it "out of her body". She asks us if we had diabetes when we were little like her (no one in our family is T1) and if it will go away when she is an adult. I try to walk the fine line between allowing her to have her feelings and making that okay, and not putting too much into it and feeding the fire. My standard answers usually sound something like "I know you don't like diabetes, insulin, etc its not fun at all, but we have to do these things so you can stay healthy and have energy to do fun things." Or "I can't make diabetes go away, but I can do everything to help you feel good by having good numbers and that means eating healthy foods and doing insulin" Or "I don't like diabetes either, but lets just do your insulin quickly now and then we don't have to think about it again until supper" I guess I kinda follow the technique that I acknowledge her feelings but try to move on quickly afterward. If we dwell on it she starts to have herself a pity party (part of which is her being dramatic as she knows it gets a reaction.) We have also sat down and let her vent about it as much as she wants, so don't get me wrong that she never gets that opportunity- she does. The major melt downs are rare and ironically those I can help her with. Its the day to day repetative comments I am not sure how to handle. I want to be her soft place, for sure. Help me get it right.
What I am wondering is, what did your parents say to you as a child that helped with the emotional side of things and what did they say that made you want to scream "you just don't get it!"
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Doris D on -
I was diagnosed at 10 and ur doing the samething my mom did. GOOD FOR U!!!! My dad?? Well that's a whole other story there. But I think that if u let her talk about her feelings and u share urs with her u guys will go far. One thing I think u must do is tell her she will never out grow it. I'm sorry for her but that's true. Bess u mom ur doing a GOOD JOB there!!!
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Permalink Reply by Jen on
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Thanks Doris. I read your post earlier today actually, which is partly why I posted mine. I never want my girl to grow up and think I did or said anything hurtful. I only get this one chance to help her adjust to her new lifestyle. I hope when she is grown she can look back and think that she was able to forget she had to live with diabetes most of the time and just got to be a regular kid. That would be the best compliment I could get.
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Permalink Reply by Doris D on
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Oh one more thing tell her she can do ANYTHING..THat will make her feel lots better my dad was one who told me I could do nothing my life was messed up (not that nicely) for now own
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Permalink Reply by Doris D on
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Oh ur welcome! I want all the kids to know that life don't end just b/c u have diabetes. U can (and will) go on!
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Permalink Reply by jessica on -
Hi. I wish my mom was on this site bcuz she wld have so great advice for u. I actually got diagnosed when I was 32. a freak ting. doesn't run in my family..nothing. it was a huge shock. I grew up vegitarian. my mom always cooked so healthy. how cld I have type 1? it was such a big adjustment. hardest thing to date I've had to go threw. I had to baically start my life over. I did have a lot of stress growing up n had a tonsil surgery about 2 yrs prior to getting sick. They r not sure how I got this so late. being tht I lived 32 yrs without diabetes...I almost wish if its in the cards tht I get this..I wish I almost got it earlier in a way. it was such a huge adjustment. does it run in ur family? ur daughter will b a pro at this at such a young age! I know my mom was very fustrated bcuz she felt helpless in the begining. my lows...highs...injecting in the wrong spot...it was tough for us both. I do have a patient tht has their 5 yr old on the pump. I was on it. I feel I'm more in control w injections but most ppl feel tht way about the pump. the canula stays in for 3 days so she wld have tht attached to her. its def an option down the rd n once u fig it out w her she wil prob have way more control. She can bolus anywhere cuz its on her n her basal wil slowly administer small amounts throught the day n night. but bcuz she's so young she may find it gets in her way. I did hear tht a new pod was coming out tht actually tests bg for u. tht wld b ideal. so w all this technology on the rise ...pumps keep geting more advanced n better so by the time she's ready for tht it wil b a big help. I am on novalog n lantis. supposedly lantis is great. when u noticed big changes in her levels...maybe write in a book what time this happend? was she over active? when did she eat? is she sick? so many things can effects bg changes. n sometimes there's no reason. its a very complicated disease. I have gone to bed at 120 n woke up at 3am at 250....it doesn't make sense. sounds like u really stay on top of it. U will see as time goes by..u will learn more and def help her manage it. I agree w ur daughter...there's days I want diabetes out of my body too. Its a 24 hr a day job. We don't get breaks from it. just hang in there...ur daughter sounds like a trooper ;).
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Permalink Reply by Eric on -
Oh my gosh, and I though I was diagnosed early (12). I think she's just in the denial state that is so natural to humans. She's so young, I doubt she really understands any of the long term consequences and just wants to be a kid. I know that's how I felt for a long, long time.
Eric
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