New to T1 -- How Long Does It Take To Get Better At This?
Hey everyone! I'm sure some of this ground has been covered, but I want to get all my fears and feelings of failure out there. I was recently diagnosed type I. I'm trying not to obsess over my numbers, but I feel like I'm failing miserably... Can you fail at being a diabetic? (Haha).
Here's the background: They originally thought it was type II and gave me Metformin, which I think squeezed my pancreas for all the insulin it had left because now that I'm on Humalog and Lantus, I have to take a ton of insulin... At least of the Humalog. I take one dose of Lantus in the mornings that is steadily increasing (at 15u this morning after I went up 40 points overnight). I have a really low carb ratio (meaning I take a lot of insulin for a little bit of carbs) and wonder whether or not it has to do with my basal. The only thing is that up until recently my basal was fine at 13 and I'd wake up at the same reading as when I went to sleep. Up until recently, I was doing an okay job with keeping my sugars in check using a 1:7 carb ratio, but last night I decided to try a 6.5ish and gave myself 7u for 46g of carbs (my reading was 105 before dinner) and before bed it had spiked to 252. I gave myself 3u to just get it into a more manageable number right before bed, woke myself up at 1:00am and it was 141 (much better), but in the morning it was 184. I guess that means my basal is off? Then what's really freaking me out is this morning I ate probably 10g of carbs for breakfast and took a whopping 8u just to see if it would bring my 184 reading down and account for my carbs, and three hours later it was 194. I've been having panic attacks at work, partially because I'm scared the insulin won't work for me and partially because higher blood sugars make me feel like doom is imminent (haha).
Basically, I was wondering how long it took you guys to get your BG under control. I want it to be perfectly under control because I've always been the kind of person who excels at things, but I know that's unreasonable. I just want to know if I should feel like a complete and utter failure for consistently getting at least one reading in the 200s per day. It's only been three months, but I hate myself whenever I get readings like that.
Also... Is it possible that insulin just won't work for me? It sounds like a dumb question, but it's my biggest fear right now (apart from the medley of diabetes complications I keep reading about lol).
Lastly, how many times a day should I test? My endo haggled with me when I said I wanted six or seven times a day and gave me five, but it's stressing me out. I feel like it's way too little. He told me to test waking, before lunch, before dinner and before bedtime, so that only gives me one extra test a day... I've been trying to experiment more with my insulin, so I've been going a low at least once every few days, and I'm stressing out because I feel like I'm using way too many test strips. :/
Sorry for the length. I just want to stop feeling inadequate. I'm killing myself trying to figure this out and having panic attacks pretty regularly. I know stress can make your readings higher, but it's a vicious cycle: I stress about not being able to get lower readings, which in turns raises my readings further, which in turn makes me stress. Ughhh. Diabetes is fun, no? /endrant
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Michael McClure on -
--> ...right now I just want to eat a piece of cake, take a shot of vodka and go back to being a carefree college student.
Love that last line. Ha!
A slightly different perspective here: I'm fairly new here, and I have seen in my short time here that there are those who like to flatline and uber-control their numbers. More power to them. That's not me -- too stressy! I realized long ago that I would either send myself crazy counting stuff (back then it was the Exchange Diet I was on...) or just be 'smart' about what and when I ate. So much has changed since those days 30 years ago -- now you got pumps and CGMs and all sorts of OCD-directed doohickeys. Personally, I love my Dexcom CGM (it is what brought me to TuD after all), but I manage on MDI, as I always have.
Directly to your stress point though -- my sugars are all over the map, though the CGM is REALLY helping me see trends and step in as necessary in front of huge spikes or extreme lows (that's SO awesome, I have to say), but, that said, I see 200s all the time. I also see 300s occasionally, as I do the 30s and 40s. Some will scoff and say I am just not in good control. Whatever. I've been doing this for 30 years now and I have no complications. That's not going to be the same for everyone, obviously, but you have to settle down and just live your life to some degree. I will say this with some need for emphasis -- STRESS in and of itself can certainly eff with your sugars! So, just worrying about your numbers can mess with your numbers! Seriously -- that is such a PITA.
So, do yourself a favor and let some of this slide. If you're at 240, it's not because you are a bad person. Likewise if you're at just 40. Sure, maybe there are little lessons to be learned along the way, and you will reel those in and do with them what you will, and maybe you will get better and better (I expect so). And then, alla sudden, one fine day everything will change on you! That's always a fun one -- when you get things dialed in, and then your body decides to completely change up on you and send you either soaring or pitching down into the hypoglycemic abyss. Again, whatever. That's the nature of this beast -- never the same twice.
Learn to live with the ups and downs and don't kick the snot out of yourself if you see high or low numbers.
hth,
/\/\
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Permalink Reply by Brunetta on -
Learn to live with the ups and downs and don't kick the snot out of yourself if you see high or low numbers.
Love that Reply, Michael. It is my 43 years with type one diabetes attitude that I grew into. works great for me.God Bless,
Brunetta
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Permalink Reply by palomino on -
Hi Marie, welcome to TuD. :) I was just diagnosed on February 10th.
Just wanted to say I have heard the 'at least it's not cancer' comment a dozen times or more... which, I feel may be a manifestation of relief from a few of them that were really worried about me. The big D sounds much more manageable to them (and I can agree) even if it is a PITA.
But it is still VERY annoying. Hang in there!
And.. just fyi.. I have learned how to squeeze in a small piece of cake or a cadbury egg without everything going haywire (well, just slightly haywire every now and then)... considering the chocoholic I was before, I need a little bit occasionally to keep me from going overboard all at once! Also.. an occasional Jameson (whiskey) and coke zero does not hurt either, but I had lots of time to experiment on a trip to New Orleans.
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Permalink Reply by palomino on
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Sorry, one other thing I wanted to add..
This may be completely different for you, but when I took Lantus once every 24 hours (before bed), I noticed it would run out about 22-23hrs in and my numbers would shoot up to 200+. My CDE got me to split the doses.. which took care of the randomly high increase at night. Then my I:C ratio seemed to settle out around 1:8 in the morning. But some days.. it seemed like I still needed even more insulin in the morning to cover things.. I changed the time I take it in the morning from 8am to 10am since I typically eat between 6am and 8am... and my I:C ratio is now 1:12.
Glad your endo listened to you and is being helpful; also that he suggested splitting the dose. Just wanted to give you a heads up that the number in the morning could possibly change because mine did.
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Permalink Reply by Tom Goffe on -
I've been at thiis since '94 and every day is a learning experience. I've come to the conclusion that what makes this hard is that we are trying to mechanically control something that the body is better at doing. In a way it is like driving down a twisting road wiith your eyes closed and having somebody tell you "turn left," "turn right..."
What has made this a challenge for me is that over the last 18 years my insulin sensitivity changes frequently and that my basal requirements (both with a pump and NPH/lantus) changes as well. About a year after I was diagnosed I put myself on a really controlled regimen. I ate the exact same measured menu for breakfast, lunch & dinner at the same time every day. I exercised identically daily and kept that program for 6 months. I expected that my BGs would fit into a narrow band and that my insulin requirements would not change. To my surprise and consternation my control was rotten. What I got out of that exercise after long reflection was to philosophically let my life rule my diabetes and not the other way around. Observe carefully and learn what works and what doesn't.
I test 8 times per day but those results paint an incomplete picture. Since using a continuous glucose monitor, I now get 288 readings a day versus 8. It really fills in what is an otherwise incomplete picture. I also use a pump which provides a real improvement when it comes to basal insulin. Instead of one shot of Lantus that acts somewhat consistently over it's period of action, with a pump I can set different basal rates for different parts of the day. This is a real advantage especially if your BG rises by itself in the early morning.
One other thing that is difficult to adapt to is that there is never a holiday from diabetes. Every 2 hours I have to do SOMETHING related to diabetes. At first that was overwhelming and it is an aspect of the disease that I suspect is often lost on our families, friends and health care providers. Keep in mind that you are not traveling down this trail alone. Together you and I and countless others battle this as one.
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Permalink Reply by Skapy on -
Sorry to hear what has happened to you, but everything will get easier. Just got to keep on sticking to your daily routine and believe that you are taking the right steps to a better life.
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Permalink Reply by Jan74 on -
I was diagnosed 3 months ago and I'm just now getting good readings - but I still do corrections. By "good" I mean I'm correcting 150s and 160s, rather than 180s and 200s. So yeah, it takes a while.
Like you, I'm an overachiever and never thought it would take this long.
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Permalink Reply by still_young_at_heart on -
Jan - you'll still be doing corrections for as long as you live. It's the nature of the beast.
Maurie
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Permalink Reply by Jan74 on
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I know it, I just hope not several times a day, everyday like now. Though to be honest, it is mostly just when I get my period. I go completely out of control then. It doesn't help that I'm correcting with Regular insulin at the moment, rather than Novorapid, either. I'm still trying to get some free Novorapid, but it will take a while.
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