No Words to Speak and Nothing to Say... I'm a T1 Diabetic.

I'm a newly dx'd T1 who as a professional communicator can find no words to express how I feel. It's been a little over a month since being told my BG was over 600 with a subsequent A1C of 15+. I can't come to be angry because there's no one to be angry at and I can't come to cry because there's nothing to really be sad about. That said I'm just stuck at a point of confusion wanting aswers where apparently none exist.

As a former elite distance runner who's now 38, I've seen ups and downs and am no stranger to adversity. The crazy part is I haven't found the nerve to tell my family and if I hadn't been admitted to the hospital after finding out, I'm not even sure what I would've told my Fiancee. I know I have no reason to be or feel ashamed, but as someone who's always been seen as the cool, calm, and collected one I'm just haven't found the words to say, "I'm a T1 Diabetic".


NewT1Brotha

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I was 22 years old in 1996 and at Great Lakes Recruit training when I found out I had type 1 diabetes. I thought it was the end for me. I had always wanted to be in the Navy and now that was over. I had to come home to all my family and friends in shame after they had such a fine send off party for me. I made it through that and found that eating low carb (before anyone heard of dr. adkins) and did it my way. Since finding that out I have stuck with it for 15 years and no complications at all doing great. Last A1C was high for me at 6.5. I have never been to the hospital and only had one low that my wife (got married twice in that time span and have a son) had to help me with. Seems with the low carb diet I don't have nearly as many lows as I did when eating lots of carbs. I hike and go on long backpacking trips by myself just always carry plenty of snacks and glucose tabs. I have never let it stop me just don't think about it much more than a small obstacle when many others with cancer and the like face extremely large obstacles. You my friend are really fortunate and blessed when you look at things that way. Shouldn't stop you or your marathons just go do it and learn from them and adjust. You will feel even better about your accomplishments knowing you overcame more than the other guys yet beat them all!
Welcome to the club . you are experiencing what every LADA person has felt. It's okay to get angry and you don't need someone to be angry with to feel this way. you're trying to be logical .Feeling are'nt logical. just don't take it out on someone else,like kicking the dog.This is a shock ;your whole life has changed in a blink of an eye. Yes ,there is something to be sad about ,the person you where is gone .It's like part of you had died . It's okay to mourn that loss as long as you don't get stuck in feeling sorry for yourself.It's not only alright to grieve for your loss ,it's a must .weall have done it.



It's not crazy that you are finding it hard to tell your family .It's like once you say it ,it will be cemented in reality.
I'm a marathon runner myself . I was dx'd a couple weeks after a race . I couldn't believe what I was hearing . I was too healthy . I couldn't be a diabetic . I thought I was too old to be a type1 and to fit to be a type2 . I never heard of anyone my age becoming a T1 . It took me a year to accept it . now it second nature.I'm still running at 56 and mylast marathon was 5Hr 15min.(not too bad for an old man) You're not alone ;we are here for you!
NT1B,

I have to disagree with you on the "nothing to be sad about" part. You may not be able to blame anyone but you can certainly be sad for the loss of carefree being. We don't have the freedom of eating a slice of pizza on the fly or walking out the door hands free, with no thoughts of when I'm going to eat next or thinking/feeling (even if it isn't true) that you will live "forever". That is a huge change and it is perfectly normal to be sad.

I can understand too your hesitancy with telling folks. I come from a family with lots of T2s and have watched many family members not take care of themselves and die. So, as a small child, I said "that will never be me". Well, I have been eating my words for the last 17 years (dx'd at 17). Even after all this time, I still have a hard time telling new friends. But ultimately, it is never as hard as it seems and mostly, they don't know what to say or do so it blows over their heads.

Give yourself a break and TELL YOUR FIANCEE!

Sara
Just say it. You're gonna be twice the man you used to be. Wear it proud. Not everybody can do what we do.

You're gonna dig the fact that you can now run wearing T-Shirt that declares "I Run On Insulin"

Take a while, work out the kinks, then get those shoes back on and hit the road. You are now eligible to be one of the few, one of the elite, one of us breaking new ground in endurance sports as T1's. The challenges will be great, but the rewards will tenfold what they used to be.

Welcome to the world of T1 athletes!
There is EVERY reason to be mad and sad. This is a MAJOR life-changing event, and will affect every aspect of your life. Maybe you are feeling numb right now, which is normal, but it is also normal to have strong feelings, which may come out later. I spent hours crying after my diagnosis, and still, after 20 years, have feelings of sadness and rebellion.

The only advice I can give you is, first, do tell your family, because they need to know. And second, start reading, so you can find out more about it. You are probably in your honeymoon period right now, when control is easy, but it doesn't stay that way, and you need to get ready for when it gets harder. And your family needs to be able to support you, which they can't do if they don't know.

And there ARE answers, but you need to educate yourself to find them. I'm sure other people will come up with names of books -- DO read them.

Wishing you the best of luck!
I found out last week and I feel the same way. It has strained my relationship with my boyfriend so much. I feel guilty feeling sorry for myself but I can't help it. It's like life revolves around diabetes and blood glucose numbers now instead of you. I just turned 20 and I feel like everything I had plans for I now have to put on hold. Hopefully it gets easier.
I felt as you do when I was dx. Denial for months, though I was compliant with meds. I realized I had accepted it when I dove into research almost full-time.

How are you doing?
Not much to add to previous comments.
Continue physical activity, it has a very positive impact on your health; the more intense the better.
As you most certainly have heard by this time, Type 1 Diabetes is a very simple condition to deal with, but only as long as you're willing to put in the effort. You can lower your A1C and BG very quickly and keep them that way, it's all a matter of attitude.
I hear you on this one my friend..I am now about 59 days in this prison of a diabetic life. I am 45 and had no clue until I had that wonderful 30lb weight loss and ended up in DKA..I on the other hand have taken this condition to teach. Everyone seems to think it's that diabetes where you take a pill..LOL!!! I guess I figure the more people I tell, the more people will be aware of their own health as well as mine (in case I go hypoglycemic) .. I also have written numerous correspondences to the first lady since she has a platform for better eating habits for children. ( Look at what's out there for adults--UGH even worse) I travel for a living so this has been a huge shock to my career. Again, don't be afraid to tell anyone---the more support you have, the easier it may be. Also, it's ok to be mad ---mad that you have to completely change your life as you knew it and it's ok to be sad---sad that life as you knew it is gone...BUT be happy--happy the the good lord gave you the chance to wake up today and lead a better,healthier and yes challenging life. I think he chose all of us T1's because he knew we would be strong enough to handle this and be role models for others in our life...When people uderstand what you go through in a day just to keep sugars in a safe zone, they will admire your perseverence and COOLNESS!!!!

Wow that was a good way to express yourself it was kinda of poetic. u have found the right site for support and to get more insight on your condition. Enjoy the site they are very friendly and helpful...

I feel your pain. Four days ago I was diagnosed and my head is still spinning. I feel so fragile now. I am afraid to do anything, go anywhere, or even be around anyone.
Anyway, I am glad to be on this forum. Your message helped me a lot.

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