Will I live to see a cure?

Or will I die right here?

Will they know I tried?

Even when it looked like I wasn’t?

Will they understand? what it was like not to eat when I was low

For fear that there may not be any more food for the next time.

Will they understand? That all the blood, and needles the highs the lows

Just wear you down, that at times you lose your will to fight.

Will they understand? That when their biggest worry is over family, work, money, friends and clothes

That a small part of me envies them? When my worries are how much insulin is left in the fridge

How many strips I have left, what about sites? And will I live to see past 30?

Will they understand? That I am thankful that they don’t have those worries

And that I pray they never do.

Will they understand? That when I die, it’s not that I didn’t love them, and didn’t want to stay

It’s just, I couldn’t fight any more.

I hope they understand,

Views: 7

Tags: insulin, poem

Comment by Lise Van Delm on April 10, 2010 at 2:37pm
Wow it's a really great poem,
some people just don't get it and it's frustrated sometimes..
But you are so much more than you think you are!
Everything is going to be allright in the end!!

We are here for you!
Comment by jennifer on April 12, 2010 at 6:28pm
Hello Dee
I would just like to introduce myself first. I have been type one for 33 yrs now and both my kids also have it and my boyfriend has type 2 thank god he only has to take pills. He has been in denial for awhile now because he watches what me and my kids go through and I think that it scares the hell out of him especially when I have seuzuires. He is very sweet when I am low he runs fast to get me something to drink or eat. Anyways thank you for sharing how you feel I understand comepletly so much so I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown when my kids got it because I did not want them to feel how I do with high and lows and being judged by those who are ignorant. No one understands anything unless they want to. At least we all have eachother to rely on when no one else understands. My friend died of cancer she had the second rarest case of it in the world. I was by her side everyday I was lucky because she lived right beside me. I have never seen someone so sick in all my life and I was raised in the intensive care for most of my child hood life. She said to me a fews weeks before she died now she knew what i lived with on a daily bases she said lucky her she gets to die and I have to suffer for the rest of my life. I was silent for awhile and I told her that i loved her and I am a tough cookie and god will only give me what I can handle. She had alot of nures coming on going all day and she told me that i was her favorite and most gentle nurse because she said that i understood how it was to be sick and soar all over. She used to find me on my back stairs having a seuzure and i was so sick I could not move my head it hurt so much and could not keep my tongue in my mouth cause i bite it so hard she would always make me laugh cause she would come on to the paramedic and after having so many seizures i would say to the paramedics that it was not a good way for me to find guys lol some of them were drop dead gorgous :) I always try to take something positive out of a negative situation. Or I would of gave up a long time ago. I will not let this disease take over anymore then I have to. I have had to quit work and school because i became so ill but i will not give up fun laughing or getting on with my day. I only have one life to live. I also have 4 other health problems oh well life always go on no matter what! I hope that you are having a good day today :) I sure am :) Keep in touch!!!
Comment by Bitter-Sweet on April 12, 2010 at 9:12pm
Beautiful...you made me cry because that's how I feel...I don't have any support from family or friends because they don't understand...that's why I love this site and my new diabetic friends.
Comment by dee on April 15, 2010 at 1:51pm
This is why I am so thankful for this site, to know that when the most important people in my life just don't get it, everyone here does. Everyone has those days that we just want to throw up are hands and say we’re done, But knowing that there are others out there that just get it, makes it easier to get through the hard days and make it to the better ones.
Thanks everyone, I hope you all have a good day.
Comment by Leah D. Rogers on April 18, 2010 at 5:21pm
Dee, We understand for them. While there are so many that simply "can't" understand.....there are way too many of us who "do" understand. If you can.....you hopefully can understand how and why they don't understand. If you weren't diabetic, you wouldn't be able to understand either. I guess that I shouldn't include myself in the "I understand" group.....as I myself am not not diabetic, as I am a parent of a diabetic child. While I try to "get it" I realize that it is not happening to "me". It is happening to my beautiful baby girl. With that said......many of us still "get it". We understand. Dee.......we understand. Never give up. Never let the evil of diabetes win! Keep fighting! You WILL see a cure.
Comment by Tim on April 18, 2010 at 6:35pm
Hang in there Dee. You've come to a good place. Only friends here to help each other. your words have touched me tonight...

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