Hey guys, so lately I have been getting really embaressed about my diabetes. I don't want people to know that I have diabetes so sometimes I don't wear my pump because I don't like when people look at my pocket and ask me what is in my pocket and start asking me a lot of quesitons about diabetes and what it's like and all that stuff. Whenever I am with people who I am not really familiar with I always try to hide my pump from them and I never check my sugar when I am around them. I also do this around some of my friends, but not all of them. I know that I shouldnt be embarrassed of this but I am, and I don't know why. So, I guess my question is to all of you is: Do you ever feel this way?

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Comment by LaGuitariste on February 2, 2011 at 12:47pm
When I'm around people who make me feel embarrassed about my diabetes, they're usually not very nice people. That's been my experience. People who are tough -- cynical, smart-mouthed, judgemental, too cool for their own good -- then I'm not comfortable being real, being ME. People who are kind and compassionate -- friendly, warm, gentle, open -- help me feel comfortable with being ME.

I suggest looking at the company you're keeping. How do you feel when you're around them in general? Embarrased to be YOU? Judged? On edge? Pressured to be someone you're not? Like they're checking out every detail and are ready to pounce and criticize? Not good.

Diabetes has taught me to accept the fact that I'm a fragile human being who needs support and compassion to thrive -- I won't spend time with people who can't accept that about me and behave with respect for my needs.

You NEED your pump. It's not optional. It's not an accessory that you can ditch when someone makes a smart-mouthed crack about it. Keep the pump, lose the bratty commenters and find friends who will support you to take excellent care of yourself.
Comment by Appie Mol on February 2, 2011 at 12:57pm
Agree with JeanV: You have the best looking pancreas, and it's not bloody and sticky and...
Your pancreas even has buttons, a screen and beeps if it needs a refill... :o)
Your friends are in fact jealous of such a gadget pancreas :o)
Comment by Donna H on February 2, 2011 at 4:59pm
I'm lucky because I didn't get diabetes until I was much older, I got to go through high school, college, and even grad school without diabetes being there, I have to imagine that it would have been a lot tougher for me to deal with then. In fact, one of my college roommates had T1 and she really tried to hide it (that was before pumps). But I have to say as he friend, in really could have cared less whether she was diabetic, It didn't change her in my eyes in the least. I really didn't think it made her different in anyway, To me, it was just something she had. Not much different than her having curly hair. I think your diabetes and pump distinguish you from others a lot less than you realize, the questions are likely truly trying to understand that part of you because they care or are interested. In fact, now I wish my roommate would have shared more about it. That understanding would have helped me when I was diagnosed years later. But I do understand that you don't want to be defined by your disease. Hiding it though seems to be in some ways making it an even bigger deal than just letting it be what it is and moving onto the next subject.
Comment by Anonymous Jim on February 2, 2011 at 5:32pm
I guess I am lucky my mother is T-1, I have 2 other relatives who are T-1 and have since I was at least in my teens been friends with people who are T-1. So life with T-1 well being an adjustment for me it is not something I see as abnormal. When I was first DXed I embraced it and refused to run off to test or to shoot up. My friends who tend to be cynical, tough and smart mouthed do it in a compassionate and open way non judgement way, usually jumping down someones throat before I can be offended by someones look or comment. I am also lucky to have come down with diabetes later in life. As for your feelings there is nothing wrong with them, but if someone is going to judge you because of being T-1 they may not be worth knowing. If you had asthma would you be embarrassed of your inhaler or if you needed a cane or crutches would you feel ashamed. You did nothing wrong so you have nothing to be embarrassed of. People ask why I have a man purse If i feel like talking about it, I tell them medical supplies, if not I like to keep a book with me. How you handle and treat your diabetes is your business and if you don't feel like explaining it to people just ignore the question or change the subject. True friends will ot judge you for being diabetic, they might go Dpolice on you which can be just as badbut at least the Dpolice hearts can be in the right place.
Comment by Anna Banana on February 2, 2011 at 6:31pm
ik wat ur going through. when im high at school and go to the nurse she gives me water and when i go back to class ppl stare at me, Plus people have been saying im gross cuz i check my self. what kid even called me emo
Comment by LaGuitariste on February 2, 2011 at 8:27pm
Tell the haters to hate on, Anna. The big D is not emo.

It just is what it is -- something we all have to deal with. Anyone who wants to put down someone for having a medical condition is very immature.

My best friend when I was 18-19 was a T1 and she was smart, sassy, fun and very cool. The only reason we're not still best friends is that she moved to a different state and back then long-distance calling was really expensive and travel was too (we were starving college students) so we kinda lost touch with each other over the years. But I still think of Tony with a warm and caring heart. She was so much fun -- so funny and creative and brave.
Comment by Kandace :) on February 2, 2011 at 10:13pm
Thank's guys! You all are so supportative :)

Anna, I completely understand what you're saying I go to the nurse alot at school and when I come back people are like "omg are you okay and why were you gone so long" and they give me weird looks.
Comment by Natalie ._c- on February 3, 2011 at 12:49am
When I taught high school, and kids were cruel to each other, I always told them it's because of their stupidity and immaturity, and if you can just breathe deeply, put one foot in front of the other, and endure, it will come to an end, and you will be let out of prison into the fresh air of adult society. School IS an institution, and kids are treated in institutional ways, and enough of them show really rotten behavior that can't be controlled by teachers, because they hide it -- but it WON'T last forever. I have so many former students that contact me, and who are so much happier as adults than they were as high-school students. It gives me hope. And joy that I was able to be a positive influence in their lives.
So right now the goal is just to survive and remember it WILL get better!
Comment by Jan on February 3, 2011 at 6:44am
My neice is not embarassed but wants to be exactly like everyone else and does not like anyone outside of her friends to know; wants to carry on with her life as if she does not have it. She does not want to explain about D constantly. She wears skinny jeans and tucks the pump to the waistband of her underpants (MM Revel has a clip attached to pump and Animas has an even thinner clip). Tubing is stuffed into the front of her jeans. She is super thin, her jeans are super tight and you cannot tell she is wearing a pump. Carries individually wrapped Lifesavers in he pockets for lows. Plenty of places she can test and bolus in private, but she is not at all shy about testing BG in public anywhere. She can go to the restroom to check and bolus or another private place if need be if she is with a crowd and does not want to do this in public. It's up to her. It's not embarrassment; it's more annoyance about having to explain when she does not want to bother to do so. It's up to you. How you feel at the moment. I think what you are feeling is normal.
Comment by linda on February 3, 2011 at 8:16am
While I realize that ya'll are dealing with Type 1, may I comment also? Honestly, this struck such an emotional response in my heart....frankly, I feel that people with T1 should never, ever feel embarrassed or ostracized due to a clearly medical situation which is not caused by anything they have, or have not, done. What I deal with is the almost constant shameful feelings of having T2 because this is something which I have "done" to myself by not living a healthier lifestyle. At least that's the biggest response I get from others. My physician isn't judgmental but after two incredibly difficult pregnancies and dealing with insulin and gestational diabetes, I should have been more careful. Frankly, though, 20 years ago my doctors mentioned that I would be at a higher risk but never told me to have checkups or any type of monitoring. Off I went into my life as a mom and never really worried again.....nor did I lose much of the extra weight. Now I deal with the fallout. That's definitely an embarrassment....there's no way to get around the fact that this is all my fault.
You, my dear, should have nothing to feel embarrassed about!! Still, I do understand not wanting to check your sugars in front of people you aren't comfortable with. I wish for you to be surrounded by lots of wonderfully supportive and comforting friends!

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