Comment by LaGuitariste on March 16, 2012 at 6:22pm

I think you did right by not talking to him.

Ignoring him is the best idea. If you can sit away from him, I'd arrange that, too. A bully will try all kinds of tricks to get your attention, so you need to learn how to tune him out while maintaining your dignity (not appearing weak or scared of him.)

Bullies thrive on negative attention, so don't give him any. Just pretend like he's invisible and eventually he'll get bored with baiting you and pick on somebody else (sad but true.)

You know this has nothing to do with your diabetes, right? He's just a messed up kid who gets an emotional reward from being mean. Not your problem.

Comment by Anna Banana on March 16, 2012 at 6:33pm

it feels like my problem

Comment by acidrock23 on March 16, 2012 at 7:23pm

If he asks you science questions, you should tell him the wrong answer. "The speed of light is 168,000 miles/ second..." LOL

Comment by jrtpup on March 16, 2012 at 8:44pm

Anna, you've put up with a lot from this angry young man. I know it's easy for me to say, but try not to give him any power to make you angry or upset. Have you tried smiling at him? Should throw him totally for a loop!

Some people, sheeeeeeeeeeesh!

Comment by garidan on March 16, 2012 at 9:13pm

Don't bother him. You are right, you can't ignore him because otherwise it looks like he hurts you (and that's true).
You have to be and look "untouchable".
He does what he does for you and childs around you, it's a show and he wanna be the main character.
You have to find a way to put him as a "guest player", and the only way I see is you get to be the star.
Don't get upset, you don't take his judgment as worthy.
Don't reply always, smile as if you have more important things to attain (and that's true too).
If you reply, don't ever give him the answer he expects, but surprise him for ex. "the light is as fast as it should be". He looks to be too much squared minded to keep up an "unconventional talk".

Best of all, try to live your daily life as good as you like, don't ever let him or others turn your time bad: they can't.

As a last note: it seems he now "plays" with you not for your been diabetic, but for you as a person. If it's true, I see it as a step forward ;-)

Comment by LaGuitariste on March 16, 2012 at 10:20pm

Anna -- I didn't mean to imply that you don't have a problem with him. I just meant that his personal problem (being ill-mannered and rude) isn't because of anything you did or said or ARE. He probably treats other people the same way because of HIS immaturity and emotional issues.

Comment by Peetie on March 17, 2012 at 5:34am

It's too bad that you must sit beside him for every class. :( Teachers need to be reminded that they often punish responsible students when they create these fixed seating plans. I suspect that the teacher seated you beside him because he felt that you would be a good role model. Perhaps you could ask the teacher to change your seat? His constant comments and rude remarks are considered to be bullying. Stay strong Anna.

Comment by Anna Banana on March 18, 2012 at 5:31pm

So the other day my friend was at my house and she called him and asked why he was so mean to me. He lied strait over the phone saying he is nice and i tell him to shut up.... he treated me like i was a nobody. she asked him why he acted like i was a nobody and he said cuz i was. my friend said well you need to be nice to her cause she is my best friend. he said oh im so sorry i feel so bad for you. she asked why and he said cause she is your friend.

Comment by Randy on March 19, 2012 at 10:44am

Bullying is a form of manipulation. People who are manipulative are really just playing a game. They do it everywhere in their lives. The game is always the same because, well, they are messed up and don't realize it. It took me a lot of years to understand this, but if you can figure out their game you will be five steps ahead of them. once this happens you no longer join them in the game and can actually turn it back on them. They usually go ballistic when you do this, but will then leave you alone because you no longer provide them with the "fun" of playing along. Ignoring his remarks are kind of a first step in that direction. People like this rarely figure themselves out and are doomed to the same smallness their entire lives. Take control and keep the high ground.

Comment by smileandnod on March 19, 2012 at 2:39pm

Hey Anna, I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with this boy and I know how hurtful it can be. I think you did exactly the right thing when you stopped talking to him. I would ignore him as much as possible because it's a reaction that he's after. If he doesn't get a reaction from you, he'll stop.

Believe me, there were boys like this even back in my day. I remember one boy who wrote something not so nice in my yearbook in middle school and I've remembered that all these many years (that was about 40 years ago!).

The funny thing is this mean boy from my school ran a political campaign many years later in our city running for city council....I told my husband I refused to vote for him! and he lost! :)

You're a sweetheart, Anna. There are plenty of other nice kids out there to be friends with. Just ignore him.

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