After 30 years of living with this disease, I want to ask WHY? Not, "why me?". Just Why.
I've never felt sorry for myself or wondered why my brother's didn't have it instead, but you would think after all these years, someone would be able to tell us why we develop diabetes!!! I know older folks who have battled 40-50+ years have more experience than me, but in my opinion even 20 years and still no clear cut answer, is unacceptable. I have often wondered where the donated $ has gone. Research? Probably research for new devices and medicines which have required us to spend more $ and no doubt made our lives somewhat easier and led to better control for many, but not all of us. I want a cure for crying out loud!!! Some of us are born with a can do, will do, won't let a darn thing stop me type of mentality, but again, not all of us are. I admire those people tremendously, but I have found that over the years of burn out and depression, I am just not that strong. I want to be, but those of you who have experienced depression know that it's just not that easy. So, now, as I am appreciating a newfound love for myself and who I am, I will try to embrace this disease for what it is and how it affects me on a daily basis and continue to shell out my hard earned paycheck on supplies, devices and meds.
Speaking of these necessary to have in order to live supplies, devices and meds, why do they have to cost sooo friggin much????? Oh my goodness!!! I am blessed to have a job and insurance, which I know many don't. I am aware that many countries have a hard time even getting what they need, but for crying out loud!!!!! In my opinion, it's rape on my finances and I don't make a lot of $. Maybe universal healthcare is the answer, maybe it isn't, but why not put regulations on the profits that pharmaceutical companies, doctors, etc. make off of us? It's just not fair. I know, I know, life isn't fair. I just feel like we get hit double time as PWD.
Speaking of insurance, why do they have to be so difficult???? Wow! I can't say I've had as many probs as others have, but I've had my share of issues. Just recently, when I decided to start taking care of myself again, my endo changed my , insulin to Levemir and Novolog. I requested the pens b/c they make life just a wee bit easier. Prior to asking for my dr. to call in these new RX's, I checked with my insurance co. online for the pricing. I saw that the pens were the same price as the vials, woohoo! So, I let the dr know what I wanted to use. The nurse called in the order and called me back to report that my insurance wasn't going to cover the Levemir pen b/c I am not arthritic and there is no medically necessary reason for me to use it! Really??? I then called to find out what the cost of the pen was w/o insurance. The lady at the pharmacy told me it was $227 for one pen. Ouch. I called back the nurse and told her I would just use the vial, but then I asked her if the Novolog pen was denied. She said it hadn't been & that I should check back with the pharmacy to make sure things were ok. I called them and they said insurance would allow that one in pen form. WTF!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously? I finally decide to call insurance and find out what is going on. I explained to the clueless lady on the phone that I had actually checked the pricing on line for these items and the website reported the exact same price for Levemir & lantus-pens & vials, as well as Novolog & Humalog-pens & vials. I asked why would they allow coverage of one pen but not the other, when I have to take both for the same reason. She really couldn't give me a clear answer except that one is a preferred insulin while the other was not. 1st of all, that wasn't the reason they gave my dr's office for denial, but 2nd, Levemir and Novolog are made by the same company, so how could one not be a preferred insulin? Well, to further my confusion, when I went to pick up my vial of Novolog, I was shocked to see that the price of the pen was $60, so I told them to just fill the vial instead. Later that week, I went to pick it up, low and behold, price for the vial is also $60. Blood is boiling right about now..... I had to buy it, b/c at this point I needed it. So I then called my insurance company again to ask what the price of the Humalog is. It is 1/2 of the price of Novolog. So my next dr appt, I asked him to switch it on over. Aren't we supposed to avoid/relieve stresses to us for better health, wether we are diabetic or not? So why do they make it so difficult????
Speaking of dr's, why are so few dr's specializing in endocrinology? There are 3 in my city of 100,000+ and not another choice for 40 miles? Isn't there $$$$$$ in endocrinology??? I look at what I pay for my care and think about the research that needs to be done to find a cure and I am still puzzled about how few endo's are out there!!! It's a disease people can live long lives with if they spend the $ to do so, Hello?????? I go to an endo that is 40 miles away, because the only one on my insurance that is accepting new patients is hardly what I'm looking for in a dr. I do like my new endo, just not the drive to see him.
Thanks for reading everyone!!!!!