Sooo .. This is my first day trying to battle Diabulemia and I guess the round goes for it :SS Yes I feel really frustrated,, but I still have the idea that tomorrow I'll master everything .. I'll ea…

Sooo .. This is my first day trying to battle Diabulemia and I guess the round goes for it :SS Yes I feel really frustrated,, but I still have the idea that tomorrow I'll master everything .. I'll eat good, exercise and manage my mood swings over the day .. but then I remember this is exactly what I did yesterday, the day before and for the last six years of my life !

Today .. I didn't have any breakfast then i went to my college and spent the day busy with lectures and everything,, but by the end of the day .. all i kept thinkking about was eating every kind of sweets I could ever think of .. the only thing that prevented me from doing this was that all my friends know that I am diabetic and they wouldn't allow me to eat anything wrong !

When I arrived hom i measured my BG for if it was below 160 I'd eat right and if not I would eat any/everything I wanted .. and it was 267 .. so i ate alot and took noo insulin .. then i had a nap and when i woke up I was feeling like I want to just die .. I felt sooo weak ! and I kept drinking a lot of water trying to avoid ketoacidosis .. but then after another hour I felt like I just wanted to eat . but I didn't uptill now .. but I'm just not happy and I know i'd be much happier if i eat what i crave !

Idon't know why it feels soo hard to let go of the only cause of my misery *overeating* .. despite the fact that I KNOW that I would be the happiest person on Earth if I become able to control my diabetes and my Body ...
But then again .. I hope tomorrow I would succeed !! :)

Views: 70

Comment by Jen on December 16, 2012 at 5:45pm

Good luck. :)

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