I am pooja.....my struggle with diabetes started when i was 9 years of age. I was a healthy child . Fat , Plump , energetic.
My father is a doctor, a child specialist and my mother , a house wife. We are three sisters. I am youngest of all.
I was loved , cared and pampered more because of obvious reasons.
When i was diagnosed with diabetes my father bursted into tears because he was able to see what laid ahead in future.
I was nieve at that time ..just a kid you know. I was not allowed to eat rice , potatoes, SWEETS ( my favourate five star). It is pretty hard for a kid. my mother used to inject me insulin .THey had to chase me alot for that.
As a kid i used to steal alot of sweets ..my mom used to catch me and eat lots of stuff at school ....yummy tiffins of my friends.
Its a irony , the thing which people say to control you tend to attract towards it more than when it was allowed.
When i was in 9th standard, suddenly i realised i looked much smaller than the girls around. At this age girls become conscious of their looks , so i was.
My bones were not able to grow according to my age ..as we know Insulin is also responsible for growth .My parents were worried so they took me to mumbai to consult a doc.
My insulin frequency was increased from two times a day to three times a day...:)
As i grew , I saw skin changes in my Legs..they were ugly brown patches.
And i was in 11th standard now...we used to wear middies in our school and i wore way too long socks to hide those patches. Again all the more conscious. Going into depression...and consequently eating more.
But i was a way too hard working student, always used to stand first in my class.So students around used to think i am very reserved kind and a proud person.
Therefore i had less friends too.
The biggest problem with most of the juvenile diabetics is that they do not meet their own kind to share their depressions difficulties , especially like me who live in remote places like SAGAR (M.P), India. Its a district though.
So i was alone to deal with it. My parents and sisters were there but you need your own kind.
As I passed school, opted to become a doctor , i was out of school , joined coaching classes.
And these coachings are like race tracks ...if you stop somewhere , you loose the race .
So i kept on studying hard , not focussing on my health ...used to keep sitting studying ..not exercising , consequently used to perform less than the other students around.
It had an impact on my mindset ...i was not able to understand why ..everything contributed to my depression ..my disease , my studies, less friends , my looks especially those dark patches on my leg.
Diabetes is a lifestyle disease!!! .....How many of us are able to understand this .
As i was not able to accept this until i was 25 yrs of age.
What i had done mismanagement in the past ...now it started appearing. I had protein in my urine, B. P patient and as most of the juvenile diabetic girls have hypothyroidism.
I started controlling my sugars and everything but was still not able to imagine what laid ahead. But my parents did know.
Most of the time i am not a negative thinker , i dont think of the worst conditions in life...but it may sometimes lead to taking life for granted.
When you are healthy , you tax your body alot....as a diabetic we are expected to live a disciplined life ....but disciplined life is required by every individual.
As i was growing older ...i started thinking of marriage and whenever i used to talk about this to my parents ..they used to say its not necessary....they always used to give more importance to studies and making me independent.
But i failed to understand them.
As you know , i used to run behind things which are prohibited to me.
So, i started searching for a life partner on my own on matrimony sites. But i always wanted to be truthful. So, i started it with a truth , by mentioning in my profile ...I AM JUVENILE DIABETIC.
lot of people did not understand what it is. I sed to explain that i take insulin injections three times a day to digest my sugars. And normal people used to get terrified and say not interested. I kept trying ..but failed to find one.
Disadvantage of being a girl , as we are considered to progenitor of everything ....so we have to be perfectly fit .
On the contrary most of the girls have more accepting power. There is nothing against boys though...i know i have met wrong people uptill now...but still hopeful.
Anyway my search for soulmate failed. Till than i completed my graduation . I was M. Pharm now. After that i joined teaching in a pharma college. My health was going down. I was weighing more..had swollen appearance..partly of increased insulin and water retention. I was regularly consulting a doctor. Createnin started appearing in my bloods. It was 3 to 4. Not on a clinical stage but yes it was a alarming signal. For months , it was stabilised on drugs but the condition started to become worst last year , when i switched to some desi ayurvedic medication of haridwar.
Those bhasmas have heavy metals in them which effected my kidneys. And my conditon precipitated.
Now my createnin raised to 6 . We used to consult docs in delhi..as it was easier for us to reach . My elder sis resides there.All were terrified and this time Me tooo...
Doctors said i had hardly 6 months before i switched to dialysis....Dialysis what it was ...i had no clue....but there were no symptoms in me...other than swelling ..and itching due to raised phosphorus.
My whole family was worried...searching for a donor ...my father was scanned at a hospital ..but his GFR levels were not suitable. My middle syster too came forward but she was PCOS and prediabetic patient . So noone in my family was suitable at this point.
I thought ..my punishment is not over yet. So was taking everything in my stride. Createnin furthur raised to 9 . It was inevitable now to not go on dialysis. Still i was fine with no drastic symptoms ...God knows how??
But Createnin is a toxin ...it may effect other organs if not removed from the body....and yes i started having boils in the genital region.
I had two times Festula surgery in both of my hands but it failed because i had really thin veins.
Now the problem was how ....the next option was permacath...but we were in search of donor as soon as we can get.....
Now we started consulting another hospital "Medanta". Our nephrologist suggested to call my father once more and get him screened here in this hospital .
He was called and screened...i dont know how...but he was found to be perfectly fit as a donor with good GFR....I guess the GFR test is very sensitive it has to be very much verified before reaching to
My father is a veru honest and sincere man...he worked hard all through his life to meake our life happy ....he is one of the best docs and people appreciate him alot and treat him like god...
I thought , my father has healed so many patients and so he will heal his daughter too
i was filled with gratitude and at the same time guilt that because of me he has to face this.....
As my transplant was near ...so docs decided to put a Intra jegualr cathetar in my neck and than initiate the dialysis...
My family was terrified because this cathetar is very sensitive ...a minor infection can lead to death as well...so absolute care was required
My first day at dialysis....heard alot that you may get cramps, low B.P, Vomiting , giddiness during the dialysis. My father was here with me , when dialysis initiated.
He remained at home ...as he could not see me in that condition....My mom took me along to have my dialysis...and back at home my father used to perform pooja ..so that everything turns out well.
I got to the hospital. I did know what was going to happen...they will fit wide pipes in my neck and my blood will be sucked out at a speed of 200 ml to 350 ml per minute.
I told the the technician to keep at 200 ml per minute...he agreed and said ..today only water will be removed out....i laid on the bed...they were cleaning around the catheter and than fiiting everything...my heart was beating....And the dialysis started...it was ok in the first two hours but in the last half an hour i had cramps...i called them and they pulled my feet back... than i was fine.
My dialysis continued for 2 weeks...not a long time...
I was admitted to the hospital on 10th july....my both the sisters were with me...my mom, dad and my
both brother in laws...
At such situations of life...God gives you extra strength and power to bear all the pain...
My father was stronger than before ...he was laughing and talking to everyone the night before...we were watching TV in the hospital...than the nurse came ..gave us some medication and we got to sleep...early in the morning we were made ready to go in the OT....
I was in my room getting ready...my sister came in and told "Paa ko le jaa rahe hai"....i bursted into tears....and still when i am writing this....i yelled ..."Papa..MERI WAJAH SE"....my mom and sis made me stop crying....
At that time my sis sang me a bhajan which i liked the most...." Shri ram chandra kripalu bhajman"
God gives you strength in various ways....
I was shifted to preoperative room...my father was on the next bed ..i said " PAPA"...he told me " Beta ghabrana nahi"....
I was in the OT now ...my father had been transferred before me.
I was given Intraepidural anesthesia and than GA.
After 3 hours i was out of the OT....coming back to life..even in my semiconscious condition i thanked the doctor who operated me...
Now I was in ICU...with all the drains in my stomach and and the incision stepled....yes nowadays they use steplers ...this was something new to me!
I saw them ...steplers going down my skin. Anyway..
In the hospital i saw sisters ..working selflessly and sincerely..they are worth respecting..they dont have any tantrums or restrains ..when they take care of a patient..
I was out of hospital after 10 days..when i saw my father i bowed infront of him ...he was in tears and happy to see me...
Since i have been ill..he was worried about this thing to happen...and it was his biggest nightmare which came true...
And I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR IT....partly the disease..
Now i am awake , alert and accepted that i am a DIABETIC
This is new life for me ...and i will handle it..
This is for my PAA who sacrificed his kidney for me...
If anybody could get a lesson what i have suffered and learnt ..it will be good..please dont run away from the disease ..it is not only hurting you ..it is effecting the people around you...