Comment by John on March 21, 2011 at 7:51pm

OMG Briar, that is not good, it sounds like you really need help. You know how dangerous Diabulimia can be, its been spoken of many times here on the site here before.

There are much better and simple ways to combat weight gain vs Diabulimia, for one you can just walk around the block a few times a day, thats all you need to keep weight below a certain level while keeping good blood sugar control. Cutting some fatty foods would also help too if that is a factor to you. Also look into online calorie calculators, they can give you a much better idea of how to gauge the food intake and weight.

However, I am also not the most knowledgeable person around here at all either, but I know others will be posting shortly after this who may have a lot more helpful advice than I do.

But please, bring that BG down, and if you're afraid of lows too, settle in the 200's temporarly until alonger term solution is made, because that sure as hell beats running 600+. Others will post very helpful advice and support behind me here.

More help is on its way

Comment by Anonymous Jim on March 22, 2011 at 3:02am

Hang in there. You can do this. Feel free to message me on here. You don't suffer alone.

Comment by Donna H on March 22, 2011 at 3:27am

I am so glad to hear that you understand that you absolutely have to do this. And I absolutely know you can. I can share with you my own story. Before I was diagnosed I lost an enormous amount of weight. I didn't even realize how sick I was =-- I was just thrilled with a huge weight loss, lower clothing size and was so sure I looked so good. But I was sick and my BG was averaging over 500. Admittedly, my situation was not really diabulmia -- I just couldn't get an endo appointment to even get properly diagnosed. When I finally got an endo to see me, she put me on insulin immediately. I told her how I didn't want to gain weight. Her comment was -- well you'll gain some of it back for sure because you have been slowly dying from malnutrition -- WOW! That was scary too me. And once taking the insulin - I felt SO much better. It was like rocket fuel. Also it straightened out some of the thoughts in my head about the unhealthy weight loss. Let's face it -- your brain needs nutrition too -- so once you get on the right levels of insulin, I think you'll start feeling not only physically better but also mentally about the whole weight thing. I'm not going to lie -- I did gain some of the weight back - -I needed to. What was a real awakening to me was that everyone around me commenting on how good I looked when the weight was back on. They shared with me that I looked so awful before -- they said I just looked sick all of the time. Here I thought I had looked great. We get so distorted in our heads about size sometimes and the lack of insulin just mixes up the thoughts in the brain that much more. I promise you, you are going to feel better in every way possible when you start getting the bg under control. Once healthy, you can manage your weight in a healthy way. Sickness is not a weight loss program. It sounds like you know that. Please let me know how you are doing -- shoot me a message now and then. I truly care. I absolutely understand how you could have ended up where you are now. I'm offering you a supportive hand to step out of this place into a healthy life. You are so worth it. And I know - just by the words in your post and the fact that you posted at all - that you are so capable of doing this. I'm so proud of you for taking the reigns on this!

Comment by Marie B on March 22, 2011 at 5:18am

We have a Group here that I'd like to tell you about

http://www.tudiabetes.org/group/diabeticswitheatingdisorders

You've taken the first step. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts today.

Comment by Linda G on March 22, 2011 at 5:20am

Hi Briar-Rose (luv that name)....it's so great that you have the determination to overcome this horrible eating disorder...but not at the expense of doing with less insulin. This (diabulimia) is too big to handle on your own. We all need support for our diabetes, well this too needs support. From groups here (see Danny's post below), or from...
Diabetics with Eating Disorders, here at Tu. (check the groups)
Research shows that female type one diabetics at 2x the risk of developing anorexia or bulimia, & 40% of 15 – 30 regularly manipulate or omit insulin in order to lose weight.
There's also this web site from the UK (not for profit organisation).....
Website: http://www.diabeticswitheatingdisorders.org.uk

As well, you need to connect with a health professional, say a nutritionist, or a dietitian AND your endo. Get support also from family or a friend....and STAY CONNECTED here, with us.
I care so much that you get well Briar-Rose. Please keep me/us posted as to how things are going DAY BY DAY.
luv ya....linda ♥

Comment by Doris D on March 22, 2011 at 5:30am

YOU CAN DO THIS!!!! Just put that in the back of your mind as you go through this terriable time. NEVER LOSE FAITH IN YOURSELF!!! That has helped me through some rather hard times at times.

Comment by Briar-Rose on March 22, 2011 at 6:44am

Thank you very much to everyone for the support. I guess I am afraid to ask a professional for help because I am afraid they will put me in the hospital. My parents probably know what I am doing, but I haven't told them in so many words. I am supposed to start counseling for other issues, so maybe that will help in some way. My doctor is just a GP, not an endo, and he is rather lackadaisical about my A1C and high blood sugar so even though he sort of knows, he's like "It's just a teenage thing" even though I'm 19! I just am really sick...my skin is sooo dry, my vision is always blurry, my throat is always sore, of course I'm thirsty, hungry, and have to go to the restroom all the time, I have constant headaches, ketones, and lately I've been having trouble breathing at night...this might all be me being a hypochondriac, but I think it's a sign that it's getting dangerous...I feel like I'm being self-indulgent by saying that I have an eating disorder but...I think I do and that's why I posted this.

Comment by Marps on March 22, 2011 at 9:10am

Hi Briar-Rose. I've been there. The symptoms you're mentioning below sound a lot like ketoacidosis. Which is very dangerous and can kill you. Please seek help. You may need to go to hospital to have them help you get your glucose levels down. I've been in ketoacidosis a few times over the course of the past 13 years (mostly caused by infections and/or illnesses) and it is sometimes fatal. Please take some long-acting insulin (if you haven't taken any today) and then call your doctor. You can do this. You may put on a little bit of weight (I put on 20 lbs during recovery), but at least you will feel healthy again- don't you miss feeling healthy? That was what made me turn the page to injections and eating "right" 8 years ago. Be careful. Know you're in our thoughts today.

Comment by Linda G on March 22, 2011 at 11:39am

Briar-Rose....please call your doc. If it is decided that you go to the hospital....this might just be the right place for you right now. I feel it is too much for you to handle alone ♥♥♥

Comment by Doris D on March 22, 2011 at 11:46am

I agree with Linda and Marps. GO TO THE HOSPITAL> LIKE NOW!!!! We don't want to lose you and all you discribes sounds like a high bs.

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