Sorry, but here is another blog about how I'm not doing well.
For the most part I do EXCELLENT during the day, BG's are in normal range, I eat well, workout and feel amazing. But at night once I come home and the all the days work and stress seem to become more visible and I cave in and basically give up. I don't care what I eat and I'll keep eating until almost an hour before bed which is 12 or 1am. This is really unhealthy and unproductive because I start my day early 7am and because I binge at night I usually have to take a good couple of hours in the morning to fix my highs and then through out the day I am tired and thirsty... But I push through the day, workout, eat healthy and make sure the things that I'm suppose to get done get done and I feel good again... but then I get home & the pattern starts up again.
I feel like I'm 2 different people in 2 different bodies and mind sets. The 1st one is willing to work hard, interact with people, study and plan events and the 2nd one that just doesn't care, wants to stay away from people and wants to sabotage all my hard work for the day. I feel like crap when I go to bed and sometimes when I wake up.... I am willing to give the new day a try and not repeat yesterday's mistakes but for the past 2weeks this pattern has been going on and I just can't seem to break it.
I honestly don't know what to do anymore. I have had T1D for almost 7years and I DO NOT want to continue this way but I have no hope in myself that I will not continue this way.
I'm so tired of this diseases that when I think about it I want to put my fist through a wall...
I just... I don't know

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Comment by Brian (bsc) on February 1, 2013 at 10:11am

Do you think maybe you are pushing yourself too hard during the day? Are you denying yourself the foods that you like? And then, at nightm when you are tired it all just caves in. You are just human.

Maybe you could give yourself a bit of a break during the day and then at night you will better able to keep on an even keel. What if you just had something that was a "treat" as an afternoon snack? Do you think that would help?

Comment by andrea on February 1, 2013 at 11:31am

I have a very similar problem...I work so hard during the day and find myself messing up at night. At 10:00 when I am tired enough to head up to bed with a cup of tea and a book...I will head to the frige instead. This screws up my numbers and my emotions. I am trying really hard to give myself a cut off time but I fail every single night! I heard on a recent morning show (cant remember which one) that it is best to pick a window of time and stick within those boundaries. I think 10am to 7pm would make the most sense for me.

Comment by boshra on February 1, 2013 at 1:03pm

Brian, that is a very good point that you make.
In fact I do just that. I try to take a break between classes and running around for the organizations I'm in and just sit, relax and eat a low carb chocolate protein bar.... But it doesn't help. I come home and I want EVERYTHING I can get my hands on.

Andrea, we are DEFINITELY in the same situation. Instead of tea and a relaxing book I go straight for the fridge when I come home... But I like the idea of a window from 10am-7pm, that makes sense and I think its healthy... I think part of me is also just scared that I will "fail" again and the cycle will stay. Nonetheless, today is a new day and I'm willing to try again!

Comment by andrea on February 1, 2013 at 2:03pm
Me too! Every day is a new day! We're all in this together. Today is the first day of a new month...I always feel like that is the perfect opportunity for a fresh start. Lets make this months goal to skip the late night snacking and allow ourselves to get a healthy good nights sleep!
Comment by boshra on February 1, 2013 at 9:28pm

I completely agree!
I actually stayed away from the kitchen tonight, well for the most part. I haven't gone in the kitchen since 8:30pm! Its a start and I'm going to try again tomorrow night:)

Comment by PCH1.com on March 26, 2013 at 11:07am

Andrea, Im a long timer. If I added to the story that you have on this February's Comments line and Blog section. I'd say weekends are for loosers, and make BB pancakes on Sunday morning as a rule w/halfandhalf syurp. And you sound very active, and so am I. If you prefect your POP corn skills, its a big snack with a little calories to use up at night. Two cups is a popped portion, and I add Extra Virgin Olive Oil and garlic and some parmesan, for me. Busy days are full of lots of activities that take energy, and go on without notice. You can add a little at each meal, if you are really a strict counter. You sound like you are. I'm not a pump, but I do a lot each day, and check and deliver every meal time, and bedtime. And did while, driving, loading and unloading, a flatbed trailer truck, and a long time at that.It's just real hard all the time and a little much is always better than not enough. PCH1.com

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