It seems like when everything in life is thrown in your face, and you just cant take it anymore, you really seem to find out just how much friends help...

In the past 3 months everything has been a crazy blur of emotions. Life was already pretty hectic, pretty out of this world. And then all of a sudden, hey guy! you're a diabetic, and you get to poke yourself with lil needles everyday. Forever. Thats really taken a toll on me. It seems like I just want to crawl under a rock and do nothing. especially all the weird feelings getting adjusted to this disease, and medication..and carb counting, blah blah

But lately, I seemed to have given up almost, stopped logging my numbers, started skipping injections, meals..going a few days without even testing my BG. kinda just gave up on being diabetic for a bit there. and then through some good advice of a few friends, realized that to hell with the pain, and being all sad and down about this. The pain'll stop, it'll all even out, and before ya know, you'll be feelin better is what I'm told. And really I didnt believe it. I'm not used to the pain, or just not feeling right. I remember just 3 months ago being this hard working, super active guy. goin to gigs, parties, doin all the bad stuff you love to do at 22yrs old! and then... Diabetes...

And now its like, I felt some diseased creature that was just told the fun was over. But at least its good to know that people care. And they're right too, its just me. If I want to still have fun, I can.. to hell with the pain, ignore it...

Live life, and dont worry about all the stress. Well its time to do just that... Its friends like that you cant really find anymore that just sorta need to say the right combo of words to hit you right.

Things seem to be looking better already, I was doing great with the diabetes, now its time to pick myself back up..grit them teeth, and live.....

This website has got to honestly be one of the best place I've been to on the net. It seems like when things are just not worth it. I come here, and can find some way to feel better

Thanks, and a big thanks to a few select people here whom I've actually talked to/met.

You've got no idea how much your freindship has been worth it.

--Johnny Crouton

Views: 8

Comment by Qayoom on September 30, 2010 at 10:01pm
Good morning!
"The treasure of the body is more valuable
than that stored in the safe,
and the treasure accumulated in the heart
is more valuable than the treasure
the body. So, dedicate themselves
accumulate in the treasure of
heart. "
A beautiful day!
Comment by Domo! on October 1, 2010 at 2:26am
you aren't a diseased creature! We are like zombies though... so far so good on the sugars, but not on the insomnia :( Hope you are doing well dear friend!
Comment by Terrie on October 1, 2010 at 6:43am
Ya, most People have fallen off the Diabetes wagon at sometime, for a while. As long as you get back up on with the rest of the gang soon after.

I hated Diabetes particularly when I was a Teenager. It got in my way too often when I was dating, going to parties, on trips, etc. and there have been times as a young Adult and later when it made me mad. It's always there!! Thankfully, I finally grew into it.

Don't worry Life is full of Fun. You just need to take a bit more care of you cuz you are important.

I'm Glad that you have made Good Friends and that you are Back. Good for you. Believe!
Comment by Kimmy on October 1, 2010 at 7:47am
You just hang in there with us! We're all in the same boat, and this is the most gracious and caring group of people I've ever been involved with!!!
Comment by catlover on October 1, 2010 at 9:24am
The fun IS NOT over. You just have to find some adjustments to have it. We all go into a funk once in a while, but when we think about the D, we realize it is in our own best interest to take care of ourselves. You are still very young, and have lots of years ahead of you, and you know what to do to stay healthy. So check your BS, and go outside take a deep breath and take a walk.
Comment by Doris D on October 1, 2010 at 6:18pm
Comment by caprifoglio on October 1, 2010 at 6:39pm
Well, I suppose the difference between making a habit of brushing your teeth every day and taking insulin every day is that you can NOT brush your teeth, and you won't be the worse for the wear at least for a little while. I guess depending on the shape you're in, "falling off the diabetes wagon" can last for a while, though with worse consequences. Either way, if you think of it as being a healthy habit to take insulin, maybe sometimes it won't feel that bad...

One has to trick oneself to get through life sometimes. Glad you found this website too. Glad I found it as well... :)
Comment by mother4peace - Christine on October 2, 2010 at 10:11am
So good to hear. You...we...are worth the effort.
Comment by Robyn on October 2, 2010 at 10:17am
You are stronger than you realize....I know I had the pleasure of meeting you and we are each other and understand. Keep fighting, you have to, it is for you and those who love and care about you. Robyn
Comment by Dana Clark on October 2, 2010 at 3:03pm
this site didn't exist when I was diagnosed 15 years ago. I spent about 2 years feeling sorry for myself- then I decided life was not over in my 20's because of the Big D. I decided to kick its *** and take control over it so it didn't control me. :) I learned its OKAY to feel how you want to feel. However it is! But, you are right- friends and family make you feel its okay to be you- however you are. I've recently gone on the pump and have this new little friend attached to me. Its been odd, but my A1C went from 7.7 to 6.9- so I'm thrilled. Find the pride in yourself to kick this disease's *** and be a role model and an awesome dude no matter what- and you will be amazed at how empowering it is!


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