How soon is too soon?
I used to think I was pretty cute and fun and a great date. And then I got diagnosed at 24. I lost some of my self-confidence for awhile because I thought who would want to deal with someone so high maintenance?? I struggle to deal with myself some days and would not want object someone I care about to this stuff.
Well I finally gained my confidence back and had a great boyfriend last summer. He was there for me through all the trying times of getting adjusted to my insulin pump. And then we broke up, for reasons not related to my diabetes. He was so great and my pump was not an issue when I decided to dive back into the dating pool. And I have discovered it is an issue, a big issue. I have had guys get disgusted over the mere thought of the pump. One even told me he thought I was cute, but the pump just completed turned him off. On our first (and only) date, he asked me if I would consider going back to shots. Um no thanks!
I don't want to hide such an essential part of my life, but how soon is too soon to tell someone? After the above disastrous date, my mom suggested I wait to tell future dates about my diabetes. I thought giving guys a head's up was a courtesy, but it seems more like a turn off? So should I hide my pump and test in the bathroom? I feel like a fraud if I don't tell people about, but I also don't want turn guys off?
It's hard enough to date in this world without having these additional worries. I am just not sure what to do!
Well I finally gained my confidence back and had a great boyfriend last summer. He was there for me through all the trying times of getting adjusted to my insulin pump. And then we broke up, for reasons not related to my diabetes. He was so great and my pump was not an issue when I decided to dive back into the dating pool. And I have discovered it is an issue, a big issue. I have had guys get disgusted over the mere thought of the pump. One even told me he thought I was cute, but the pump just completed turned him off. On our first (and only) date, he asked me if I would consider going back to shots. Um no thanks!
I don't want to hide such an essential part of my life, but how soon is too soon to tell someone? After the above disastrous date, my mom suggested I wait to tell future dates about my diabetes. I thought giving guys a head's up was a courtesy, but it seems more like a turn off? So should I hide my pump and test in the bathroom? I feel like a fraud if I don't tell people about, but I also don't want turn guys off?
It's hard enough to date in this world without having these additional worries. I am just not sure what to do!
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Comment by Theresa on April 21, 2011 at 7:50pm -
Just my opinion, but I say if he can't except the diabetes as part of you then he DOESN'T deserve you! My son is Type 1 and I would not want him to ever feel like he has to hide it. The person you are meant to be with will certainly except your diabetes.
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Comment by Terrie on April 21, 2011 at 8:05pm -
Goodness, don't let anyone take away your confidence Girl. You are an Intelligent, Fun and Pretty Young Lady. You have a lot going for you. I didn't really think of Diabetes as a total downfall since I felt that I had a Good amount to offer a Decent Man. I told each Guy I dated that I had Diabetes, after several dates. By then I knew, whether or not I liked the Guys enough to tell them. Then I watched for their true reactions. You keep your head high. Most Guys like a Fun, confident(not pushy) Woman.
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Comment by karebear1966 on April 21, 2011 at 9:25pm
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Its part of who you are now, dont hide it, that way if it "turns them off" you wont have wasted precious time with a flake. I do know what its like to be in this dating game these days, and its just not fun at the best of times. Just be your fabulous self and you will attract a fabulous man. ( as much as a man can be fabulous...LOL) Hey I am over 40 I can say that! LOL
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Comment by Frankie Sloane on April 22, 2011 at 12:36am -
Oh my! Anyone who reacts that way to something that you live and breath, is certainly NOT worth your time anyway. I think instead of asking yourself whether or not you should test and inject in the bathroom, you should ask yourself "does this guy deserve me and my wonderful diabetic self"?
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Comment by Joe_h on April 22, 2011 at 9:39am
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if that scares them off then then they are Dbags and that is worth knowing that up front so you don't waste any more time on them - just sayin'
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Comment by Kari on April 22, 2011 at 3:51pm -
I agree with the people below who say that these guys are just jerks! Anyone who reacts to something that is keeping you alive and healthy is just ignorant and small-minded......is that anyone you'd want to be with long term, anyway?
You WILL find someone accepting and wonderful, I promise! I was with someone for years, we were engaged, then he did a total 180 and said he couldn't deal with the diabetes. My confidence was shaken (more like destroyed), but I got back out there after a while, and I had some failed attempts at dating (jerks)...then found my wonderful boyfriend who is wonderfully accepting of my diabetes and all my related gadgets!.........It will happen for you too :)
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