There once was a time when I was the best diabetic I could be. I was on top of my game all the time. I was so in tune with my body. I was able to make minor adjustments to my pump on my own. If I saw a bad blood sugar on my meter I would get upset at myself. If it was high, I would think "kidney-failure" or "blindness". If my blood sugar was low I would eat exactly 15 grams of carbohydrates. I tried so hard to take care of myself. Then I don't know what happened...

Maybe it's because I started college. Does anyone else feel like there isn't enough time in the day to manage your diabetes? My blood sugars can be anywhere from the 40's to the 300's. I haven't passed out or had any medical emergency, but I really haven't taken care of myself like I should have.

I can't go a day without both high or low blood sugars. I just feel like there isn't enough time in the day to figure out what went wrong. Sometimes I just change my basal rates right then instead of waiting another day to see if that was the problem. When I see a high blood sugar I don't get the slightest upset. I just correct it. I only get annoyed because I don't feel good. I've been overeating when I'm low, trying to get my sugar up so I could concentrate. My doctor is amazed that I made the dean's list because he doesn't see how I could do it with such a vast range of sugars.

Any tips? How do I get back on track. Please try to be positive and supportive. I am really embarrassed about this. I don't know how I let myself get like this.

Views: 150

Comment by shoshana27 on January 22, 2014 at 12:23am

I HAVE HAD T1 SINCE I WAS 3 YEARS OLD 77 YEARS AGO
DIABETES ALWAYS CAME FIRST
SOME THINGS I HAD TO DO BECAUSE I HAD T1
SOME THINGS I COULD NOT OR SHOULD NOT BECAUSE.......
BUT THINGS ARE DIFFERENT TODAY WITH METERS & PUMPS & DIFFERENT KINDS OF INSULIN
THINK ABOUT IT........IF YOU HAVE SMALL FEET YOU CANNOT WEAR LARGE SHOES & VICE VERSA

Comment by Chadha on January 22, 2014 at 1:37am

I had been similar what you were previously. Ever since I switched to the pump my readings have become erratic. I would suggest you to basal testing and figure out where you are going wrong. Because being T1 I feel my insulin needs fluctuate so much. If there is even lil increased in my activities more than a day or 2 I will need to decrease my basal n when I dont dont do it anymore neds change again. As you are saying you joined college, and of course there will be increase in actiivity as well so possibly your insulin needs have been changed.

Comment by marty1492 on January 22, 2014 at 8:12am

Dear Shana,

Thank you so much for posting about the challenges you are facing! It's hard to ask for help and advice when you are feeling embarrassed (and probably a little ashamed).

You clearly have very high standards for yourself. Whatever you are focusing on, you want to do the best job possible! It's really hard to balance all the different priorities that are asking for your attention and for your "best" when you are in college!

There are other people here who have--or have recently had--the same struggles, and probably they can make more pertinent suggestions.

I would only offer that (although it's intense) college (and your grades and most of the people you know there) is only going to be a very short event in your life. And diabetes, and its affect on our health, and the results of the choices we make about it, are here with us for the long haul.

Thanks again for sharing and asking your help!

Wishing you all the best,

marty1492

Comment by swisschocolate on January 22, 2014 at 12:24pm

i think the best thing to do is not push you into something. dont think you have to be the perfect diabetic. you are already doing a great job!!
maybe it could work if you would take yourself 5 minutes each evening reflecting about your day with d. that way you might not make these quick decisions you dont want to make.
step by step, you can get this done!!
good luck, SC

Comment by renka on January 26, 2014 at 10:38pm
I just post a blog looking for help and support myself! I just came across your blog. I'm not in college but I am having the same challenges. All I can tell you is that you've done well in the past which means you can do well now and in the future. You need to grab your control back. when you go to college life gets hectic and busy, just remember how important it is to keep diabetes your priority! I know you can do it. Take that extra few seconds it means to test your sugar and you your insulin. I'm here for you to listen and help if you'd like to friend me.
Comment by Deb W on January 27, 2014 at 4:54pm

Keep strong, it sounds like you are doing very well. None of us is perfect and many times it's hard putting so much pressure on ourselves.
Be well and try to take care of yourself as much as possible.

Comment by Shana on January 29, 2014 at 4:14pm

Thank you everyone! This week's been better. I'm not perfect yet, but my sugars have been in a good range more often than not. I think I just needed to sit back and take things into perspective rather than just throwing my hands up in the air.

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