This is gonna be my truth. I'm going to stop lying to myself and those who love me. I am taking myself away form my kids. As each day goes by and I eat things that are horrible for me that is one more nail in my coffin. No more I'll start the diet tomorrow. I'll enjoy this today cause tomorrow I won't eat it.
I have a addition to food. I am fat and nasty in my eyes. I know my husband would love some hott wife. I want to give him that. He deserves that. God that man is good to me. I just have to let him in. My kids deserve a active mom. I'm always tired. I want to sleep, Man how I want to sleep. That's all I want to do. Of course I don't. With my husband is deployed that makes it impossible. Instead I am mean and just plain tired. It's Christmas day. The kids had a pk day. I yelled allot when I found had torn into some of the presents under the tree and tried to hide it. That set the day up for failure.
I need help and lots of it. I have asked the doctors for help. Nothing.
I checked my sugar today. The first time in months it was 197. Wow Sonya are you ready to die. There is no telling how high it has been.
God I want to make this right. I will do anything you ask. Just let me live to grow old with him.